Ultimate Ridonculous Race
by TDI Charlie Brown
Summary: After the success of The Ridonculous Race, the public demands more. So Don assembles the past eighteen teams and eighteen new teams for another epic race around the world! Join these characters as they travel the world for another great race. Pairings include Devin/Carrie, Noah/Emma, Stephanie/Ryan plus new ones to come. (Kitty/Mickey friendship that could become a romance)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N – Hey guys. Strap in! This is going to be a BIG one. Don has returned once again to host another round of The Ridonculous Race. All eighteen teams have returned once again to compete in the race of a lifetime. But that's not all! They will be joined by eighteen more teams for a grand total of THIRTY SIX teams! So that means double the fun! Double the excitement! Double the drama! And quintuple the work for me lol. (But I'm ready to take on this challenge... BRING IT ON!)**

 **This story will take place one year after the Ridonculous Race ends and will pretty much be a continuation of everything that happened with the original characters. So all the relationships that started in Ridonculous Race will continue on as well (Devon/Carrie; Noah/Emma; Ryan/Stephanie) in addition to a few new relationships. In addition to this, this story will also take place in the same universe as "A Codette World Tour", so Geoff will NOT be dating Bridgette in this one and there will be certain mentions by certain characters.**

WARNING – The story will be rated T. It contains some mild language, dramatic romance scenes, and grannies that kick ass! In addition to the seventy-two characters I am forcing myself to write, there will also be another certain character returning that I'm pretty sure you'll all be excited for. (I think old readers of mine will be able to guess who it is)

 **With all that said... here... we... go!**

 **THE ULTIMATE RIDONCULOUS RACE**

ROUND ONE – Union Station (Toronto, Ontario, Canada)

The streets of Toronto, Ontario were buzzing with excitement as citizens on Canada's media capital flocked over to historical Union train station. There were countless concession stands set up selling their goods to the anticipating audience. Everything from food, drinks, to merchandise for the upcoming event were flying from vendor's booths. 65 Front Street West had been blocked off by railing and security as if a parade was about to come marching by. But it wasn't a parade that the fans were anticipating.

Ever since the finale of last years hit reality show The Ridonculous Race, fans around the world had been begging for more. More action. More excitement. More adventure. More of their favorite contestants working together or trying to tear each other apart. Finally, after much public demand, the producers decided that another season would be a good idea. But, in order for this one to be even better than the last, they were going to need to change some things up. Including the number of contestants that were going to be participating. So when the news hit the streets that the network was looking for eighteen more teams to compete alongside the original eighteen teams, applications and audition videos came pouring in. It was a difficult process, but in the end, the network managed to select the eighteen teams they felt would be best for the show. Plans were made. Locations were selected. Challenges were tested. Finally, at long last, the second Ridonculous Race was about to begin.

At the grand entrance of Union Station, a familiar middle-aged man emerged and began to descend the stairs towards the roaring crowd. He smiled his bright smile and brushed his light brown hair with his hands (he wanted to make sure the fans got to see him at his best). This man was Don, the host of the event. He approached a podium that had been set up for him and proceeded to speak to the audience.

"Hello ladies and gentlemen," Don greeted the fired up crowd. "and welcome to the historic Union Station here in Toronto, Canada. Not only is this Canada's primary railway station that is responsible for carrying over 250,000 people a day to their destinations throughout the country, but it is also on these same streets that marked the beginning of an epic journey around the world for thirty-six people just one year ago. Therefore, we decided that it would only be fitting if we made this the starting point of this year's contest. Because once again, those same teams are going to be going on another adventure as they compete against each other in the greatest race to ever take place in the world... THE RIDONCULOUS RACE!"

Fans cried out in excitement and were more fired up than before. Almost as if they were anticipating the beginning of an amazing rock concert.

"That's right folks! Once again, your favorite racers are going to be racing around the world for another one million dollar prize! But this time, the race is going to be even harder for the contestants. Because as promised, the challenges are going to be harder; there will be new twists that will make things more challenging for our racers; higher risks that will either end in great reward of even greater despair... and as promised, the original eighteen teams are going to be joined by eighteen NEW teams for double the excitement, double the thrills, and double the action!"

Once again, the fans cheered. The anticipation of this year's race was growing to be more than the fans could bare.

"And we will meet those eighteen teams a little later on," Don announced. "But as for now, what say we bring in the eighteen original teams!"

The crowd roared with excitement.

"Very well then! Let's get right to it! Our first team didn't do very well last year, but these two young ladies have been looking forward to their chance of redemption ever since this season was announced. Please welcome back **The Geniuses, Mary and Ellody**!"

The two young ladies made their entrance from the train station towards the podium where Don awaited them. Fans in the audience cheered for them, which made the two girls blush somewhat.

"So ladies, are you ready for your chance of redemption?" Don asked.

"Indubitably, Don," Mary replied. "We've taken notes and learned from our mistakes last season. And we can both concur that we will not be making the same mistake twice."

"Precisely," Ellody concurred. "No more over thinking. No more relying too much on data. No more taking a strict scientific approach."

"Oh? So you've decided to just wing it this time?" Don asked.

"Negative," Mary replied. "We've already come up with formulas for numerous challenges and have calculated countless possible outcomes for numerous situations. We've prepared courses of actions for these situations before hand this time and are fully prepared for everything you could possible throw at us."

"Well then, we'll see if that pays off for you," Don chuckled. The naivety of the geniuses amused him somewhat. "Good luck to you both. Please, take your place at the starting line!" The two girls waved to the crowd once more as the headed for the streets. "Next ladies and gentlemen, please welcome one of the most dysfunctional mother/daughter relationships to ever be broadcast on television, second maybe to the Kardashians, **Mother and Daughter, Taylor and Kelly!** "

Kelly and her now seventeen year old daughter Taylor made their way from the train station to the podium. Along the way, Kelly waved to the crowd happily. But Taylor just focused on applying her lip gloss as she stared into a pocket mirror the whole time, ignoring the mixed reaction the two received from the crowd.

"So ladies. Have you two worked out your mommy/daughter issues?" Don asked.

"Well Don, we've been seeing a counselor for the past year," Kelly explained with a lighthearted laugh. "He says that we're making progress... slowly, but surely, we're making progress."

"It'd be a lot easier if you'd just admit that I'm right all the time," Taylor muttered as she brushed her hair back.

"Honey... we talked about this just last week," Kelly retorted somewhat sternly as she placed her hands on her hips.

"... all right, fine. MOST of the time. You have your moments here and there."

"That's better, hon," Kelly happily replied as she hugged her daughter. But Taylor didn't seem to care at all.

"Okay then... best of luck to you ladies. And best of luck to your counselor. Please join the geniuses at the starting line."

Taylor and Kelly waved to the crowd once more as they headed down to the starting line

"On to our next team!" Don announced excitedly. "They're the twins that constantly overcome adversity, thus properly named **The Adversity Twins, Jay and Mickey**!"

Said twins made their way down the steps of the Union Station as they were announced. At first, the roaring crowd startled them and the twins were almost overtaken by stage fright.

"Ugh... loud noise," Mickey whimpered as he grabbed onto Jay 's shoulders for support.

"Give it a minute, Mickey. It'll pass... or we'll pass out whichever comes first."

"Well... come on down guy! Your fans are awaiting you!" Don called up.

"F-F-Fans?" Mickey whispered.

"Y-Y-You mean... people actually LIKED us last year?" Jay asked.

"Of course! And some of them are... ladies, I might add," Don replied with a sly grin on his face.

As Jay and Mickey looked out into the crowd, Don's claims were proven true. There were indeed some girls in the crowd that were holding up signs in support of the adversity twins. And some of these girls were considered quite attractive. This gave the twins the motivation to overcome their stage fright.

"What do you say Mickey?" Jay asked, puffing his chest out. "Ready to overcome adversity one more time?"

"LET'S DO THIS!" Jay retorted, pumping his fists into the air. The two began racing down the steps of the station as the crowd roared in excitement for their arrival. Unfortunately, the moment was ruined as Jay tripped over his shoelace, bumped into Mickey, and sent the two tumbling down the steps and into the streets, knocking down the other two teams in the process.

"Ooh... that's gonna leave a mark," Don cringed.

When the dust cleared, the crowd's silence broke out in laughter as a humorous site awaited them all. Poor Mickey was caught in between Mary and Ellody in an awkward position that, unknown to the girls, was making the twin wearing the headgear blush fervently. Ellody was laying on top of Mickey with her chest area pressed against the back of his head all while his chin rested in Mary's lap. Poor Jay wasn't much better off. In the course of the collision, Taylor found herself laying directly on top of Jay, her face inches from his.

"EWW! EWW!" Taylor cried out, pushing herself off of Jay instantly. "Mom! Anti bacteria wipe! I need an anti bacteria wipe! Scratch that! Make it two! No! Three! Ten! STAT!"

"Right away, sweetie," Kelly said as she fished around her purse for some disinfectant wipes.

Jay moaned in pain as he tried to sit up. He felt a hand grab his and pull him to his feet.

"Ugh, thanks," he groaned. "I don't know what happened. I just..."

Jay's words were cut short when he saw who had helped him up. Unfortunately, he wasn't too happy to see this person again.

"Hey, are you all right?" Emma asked, looking concerned.

Memories of Emma sabotaging their chances during last years race come flooding back to Jay. The memories caused Jay to glare bitterly at Emma.

"What do you care?!" Jay snapped, pulling his hand away from the law student. "Or are you looking for any weakness to expose on us again?!"

"Look Jay, I know you're still mad at me for what I did to you last year," Emma replied, rubbing her shoulder uncomfortably. "But it wasn't anything personal against your or Mickey. I just wanted to make sure Noah didn't get eliminated and..."

"...you sacrificed US for YOUR gain!" Jay interrupted, visible upset.

At the podium, Don was just eating some popcorn as he watched the scene unfold. "You know, I was going to introduce **The Sisters Emma and Kitty** and interview them about their chances this year... but this is WAY better."

Meanwhile, Kitty had helped Ellody and Mary to their feet. After helping them brush their clothes off and making sure they were okay, she helped Mickey to his feet.

"Hey there. You okay?" she asked.

Mickey rubbed his head, a little stunned after falling down the steps. But when he looked and saw who was speaking to him, the pain seemed to instantly vanish. His face became red once more as he gazed upon the beautiful, perky girl standing there smiling at him.

"Y-Y-Yeah," he managed to whisper. "T-T-Thanks."

"You're welcome," she happily replied as she brushed off some stones that were on his shirt.

Mickey turned his head away shyly as Kitty brushed him off.

Mickey would have liked to continue the conversation, but the argument between Jay and Emma has escalated to a shouting match, cutting them both off.

"UGH! Why can't you let it go already?!"

"Oh! I'm sorry! You're TOTALLY right! I should just forget about the time you cost me and my brother a million dollars!"

"For the last time, I said I was sorry about that!" Emma snapped.

"Save it!" Jay angrily retaliated. "And stay out of our way this time! Or I promise you... you and your sister WILL be another adversity that we WILL conquer!"

Emma just glared at the twin as he yelled back at her. "Fine! Same goes for you and your runt of a brother! Kitty! Let's go!"

Emma marched over to her sister and then, without waiting for a response, dragged her by her arm away from Mickey. Kitty looked back at the twin with headgear apologetically and mouthed 'good luck' to him. Mickey mouthed back 'you too', a faint blush still on his face.

"Well, that was dramatic," Don said as he sipped on his soda. "But as the saying goes, 'the show must go on'. We've got thirty two more teams to introduce, so let's not waste any more time! Next folks, please welcome back a team that did surprisingly well last season, **The Goths Crimson and Ennui!** "

Crimson and Ennui both made their way down the steps of the Union Station towards the streets and cheering crowd. As usual, they wore the same, emotionless expression on their face that they had come to be famous for.

"I'm so excited for this," Crimson said in her monotone voice.

"I can hardly contain my excitement," Ennui added, also in a monotone voice.

As usual, Loki, the team's pet that had joined them last season back in Australia, was riding on Ennui's shoulder. The Gothic rabbit still looked as menacing as ever as he proudly wore his goth makeup and pumped his paws into the air. Much to his surprise, fans in the crowd were holding up signs with his name on it. The goth bunny folded his arms proudly and stood taller than ever on Ennui's shoulder.

"I would interview them, but if they're anything like last year then it would be a waste of time," Don muttered. "So I'll just wish the two of you good luck and ask you to go to the start line."

Loki growled at the host, causing him to gasp in surprise. The Gothic rabbit was quite offended that he had overlooked the team mascot.

"All right, all right. The THREE of you," Don said while rolling his eyes.

Loki lifted his nose at the host and folded his arms triumphantly as Ennui carried him down to the starting line.

"Let's just move on to the next team," Don continued. "Our very own **Fashion Bloggers Tom and Jen** are back for another round!"

Tom and Jen made their way down the steps next, waving and flaunting themselves to the audience. If there was anything they loved, it was a crowd giving them attention. After soaking in the cheers from the crowd, they made their way over to Don.

"So guys," Don began, "many people are saying that had it not been for your little spat with one another back in Transylvania, you two could have been serious contenders to win the race last time. Have you worked out all your issues this time around?"

"Most definitely Don," Jen confidently answered. "Just like we discovered last year, though too little too late, we've agreed that we can only work as a team. Without Tom, there is no Jen."

"And without my girl Jen, there cannot be a Tom," Tom added. "One cannot exist without the other. We can only do well if we work together."

"And this time, we WILL work together all the way to victory!" both bloggers cried out in excitement. This got the crowd excited as well and they cheered for the team.

"Well, good luck to you both," Don said.

"Thanks Don!" Jen replied. Then, without warning, she snatched the microphone from podium. "And to all the viewers out there, be sure to check out our online blog "Tom and Jen's Fashion Statements!"

Tom then leaned over Jen's shoulder and added, "Be sure to like us on Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, Instagram, Pinterest, BlogSpot, and DeviantArt! All accounts have the same name as our blog!"

Jen then handed the microphone back to the host and the two made their way down to join the other five teams.

"Hmph... rude and self promoting much?" Don muttered. "Anyways, let's keep things moving with..."

"Out of our way! We're being introduced first!" came an angry female voice.

"No way! WE'RE being introduced first!" came another female voice, though this one a little younger.

"And what makez you zeenk you're more worthy of being introduced first?!" cried out a male voice with a french accent.

"Symbolism!" came a gruff female voice. "Just like in the race, it's gonna be you two coming in AFTER us!"

"Oh! THAT'S AN INSULT!"

"Hey! You DID get a little smarter over the past year, didn't ya?"

"Out of our way!"

"No! YOU get out of OUR way!"

"NO! YOU... ARGH!"

"AAAUGH!"

The doors of Union Station burst open as two teams came tumbling down the stairs, wrestling for control the entire way down. Don had to move out of the way to avoid being caught up in the mini-rumble. The other teams screamed and moved out of the way of the oncoming fight. When the teams reached the bottom of the steps, the struggle continued.

"OW! Hey! No biting!"

"HA! Ze race hasn't started yet! We can do what we WANT!"

"GET! OFF!"

"No way sister!"

The crowd just watched as the two teams continued to roll around, struggling to get the upper hand in the encounter. Some people were cheering for their favorite team while others watched in shock and anticipation. Finally, after a long minute that seemed to go on forever, the fight ended when a short, stout, but tough looking lady in a police uniform shot up from the fight and stood victoriously.

"HA! WE BEAT YOU!" McArthur cried out. "IN YOUR FACE ICE DANCERS!"

"Oh! I don't zeenk zo!" Jacques angrily retorted, shooting up from the ground as fast as McArthur had. "WE were ze first team to arrive on the streets."

"Oh! You wish!" Sanders snapped back, now on her feet and standing by her partner's side.

"We don't wish! We achieve!" Josee growled as she climbed onto her feet.

"Like how you achieved that silver medal at the Olympics?" Sanders slyly asked.

"Or the bronze during last year's race?" McArthur added, grinning wickedly.

"WHY YOU TWO LITTLE..."

"Save it for the race, you four!" Don shouted over the commotion. "Fans want to see you duke it out in the competition. Not beforehand."

The Ice Dancers and the Cadets continued to glare daggers at one another. It was clear that this rivalry was about to spark up once again.

"Do I even NEED to introduce **The Ice Dancers Jacques and Josee** or **The Cadets Sanders and MacArthur**?" Don asked.

"NO!" answered the other teams as well as everyone in attendance.

"Yeah, I didn't think so either. So let's move on, shall we? Next we have the **Step Brothers Chet and Lorenzo!** "

Chet and Lorenzo made their entrance playing their theme song to air guitar and horrible singing that made members in the audience cover their ears in agony.

" _Step Brotheeeeeeeeers. Step Brotheeeeeeeeeeeers. STEEEEEEP BROOOOOOTHEEEEERS!"_

The two continued to sing their theme song aloud, not caring that they were receiving negative reviews from music critics around the world. The two approached Don.

"You like it Don?" Chet asked. "We're making plans to release that song worldwide soon!"

"Great," Don chuckled somewhat sarcastically as he removed a pair of earmuffs he had put on during their act. "In the meantime, I wouldn't quit your day jobs just yet."

"No worries Don! We never had day jobs to begin with!" Lorenzo proudly claimed.

The host rolled his eyes at this comment and mentally pushed it aside so he could focus on his interviewing duties.

"So guys. Last year you argued and fought for the majority of your time together in the competition. But in the end, you made amends and discovered that you're almost the perfect team. With your rough past behind you, do you think you'll be able to make it further this time?"

"No doubt!" Lorenzo confidently replied. "We've already made plans on how we're going to win this race!"

"Yeah! And it helps that we decided that I was going to be the team leader," Chet added.

This caught Lorenzo off guard. "Ehehehe... funny Chet. But I'M the one that's in charge this time, remember?"

"Yeah... no," Chet rebuked chuckling. "I'M going to be the leader. We discussed this last night."

"No. You discussed that. I said no."

"Well, I said yes."

"No. I'm the leader."

"No. I am!"

"No. I am!

"I am!"

"I am!"

"I AM!"

"I AM!"

" **I AM!"**

" **I AM!"**

Within seconds, Chet and Lorenzo were wrestling on the ground and throwing punches at one another. The two continued their fight while rolling down the steps towards the street.

"Seriously! Are these steps greased or something?" Don asked as he watched the two roll down.

Down below, the other teams saw the oncoming brawl and quickly got out of the way once again. That is, except for the Ice Dancers and Cadets who were still glaring too intensely at one another to notice. But that would stop the instant the two teams were inadvertently pulled into the cloud of dust and fists. That cloud then continued to move along the street for a few yards as fists from both Chet and Lorenzo would be seen swinging every now and then.

"WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!" Chet cried out.

The dust cloud disappeared and revealed the Ice Dancers and Cadets lying on the ground in agony and confusion.

"What the heck happened?" McArthur groaned. "Did I just get get to second base with someone?"

"You were right, Lorenzo," Chet said as he helped his step brother onto his feet. "You DID say you were going to be the leader... for half of the race."

"Oh yeah! You're right! I DID say half of the race. And that YOU were going to lead us the other half!"

"Yeah! DUH!" Chet exclaimed, smacking himself on the forehead. "Sorry, bro. I guess I got caught up in the excitement of the crowd and all that."

"Yeah... I'm sorry too Chet."

The step brothers then fist bumped to seal the truce, much to the pleasure of the crowd.

"Dat iz very touching and all... BUT CAN YOU PLEEZE GET OFF OF US?!" Jacques cried out angrily.

The step brothers glanced down at their feet. Sure enough, they were standing directly on top of Jacques and Josee, who were both groaning in agony.

"Oh... sorry," both Chet and Lorenzo apologized.

"...be... be sure to add them to the list..." Josee weakly said to Jacques.

But no one would hear her say that as everyone had turned their attention to the next team to arrive: **The Tennis Rivals Gerry and Pete**.

"Welcome back gentlemen," Don greeted the retired tennis rivals. "Honestly, I have to admit that I'm kind of surprised that you've decided to do this again considering you said last year that competing in this race was a bad idea."

"Yeah, it probably is," Pete agreed. "But what can we say? We could use the sponsors. Not to mention we've both agreed that we're just going through a late life crisis."

"Yeah. Most men do stupid things when they reach our age! Some old men go out and buy a motorcycle. Others try to start up their own business. We go on The Ridonculous Race!"

The two shared a laugh at this joke before joining the others on the streets below.

"How can anyone not like those two?" Don laughed. "And speaking of a couple which people can't NOT like, here comes the Ridonculous Race **Best Friends, Devin and Carrie!** "

Indeed, the crowd could not hate these two. The two waved happily to the crowd as they made their way down the train station steps hand in hand, much to the excitement of the crowd. Then, to play up to the crowd and to surprise his sweetheart, Devin suddenly swooped Carrie into his arms, leaned her slowly backwards, and gave his best friend a deep, passionate kiss. Carrie squealed in surprise at first, but was more than happy to return the kiss much to the crowds excitement.

"Where did that come from, Casanova?" Carrie asked when they finished.

"Nowhere," Devin replied. "I just felt like doing it. You know, years of catching up on that and all."

Carrie blushed greatly as Devin helped her back on her feet. Then, hand in hand, the two went down the stairs and met Don halfway down.

"So then... should we call you guys the Daters Version Two?" the host asked.

"No, that won't be necessary," Devin replied. "Even though we're dating, we're still best friends."

"Yeah. I'm just one of the lucky ones that gets to date her best friend," Carrie added as she kissed Devin on the cheek.

"Well, glad to see you two are doing well," Don replied. "Keep it up and maybe you'll be an even bigger reality television couple than Cody and Bridgette!"

"Oh! I don't think that's possible," Carrie chuckled. "NO ONE can outdo what those two went through in Total Drama World Tour."

"...though I wouldn't mind trying," Devin replied, pulling Carrie in close. "Hey! Speaking of which, I heard that some of the new contestants are former Total Drama participants! Are Cody and Bridgette going to be competing?" **[1]**

"Well, we DID extend the invitation... but Bridgette recently became pregnant and Cody doesn't want to leave his wife's side, so sadly no," Don explained. "But you'll see who shortly. In the meantime, go join the others, think about how you can outdo Cody and Bridgette as the ultimate reality couple, and for heaven's sake watch your step. We've had more contestants fall down these steps today than I care to see and we all know how accident prone you are Devin."

"Don't worry Don," Devin assured the host. "No distractions. Now that I've got Carrie by my side, nothing's going to keep me fro- **AUGH!** "

Devin spoke too soon. He had his eyes on his girlfriend at the time he stepped forward and misjudged the step. The poor guy tripped and went tumbling down the steps. This time, the victim at the bottom would once again be an unsuspecting Taylor who had been filing her fingernails. Before she realized what was happening, she was being knocked off her feet and falling to the ground.

"Seriously! Did someone jinx these steps today?!" Don asked as Carrie frantically raced after her boyfriend.

Down below, Taylor groaned as she rubbed her forehead.

"Seriously?! Again?! Why the heck can't you people watch where you're..."

When Taylor saw who had landed on her, she almost immediately lost her voice. Unlike Jay from earlier, she was quite content with who had landed on her and felt her face begin to flush.

"Uh... sorry about that," Devin chuckled as he stood off her.

"Um... yeah... forget about it," Taylor replied as she stood off the ground and brushed her clothes off. "No worries... like, forget about it. It's cool."

"Devin! Are you okay?!" Carrie cried out when she reached her boyfriend. She didn't give him a chance to answer as she was now worriedly checking him over for injuries.

"Carrie! Please! I'm fine," Devin laughed. He couldn't help it. Carrie was so cute when she worried about him.

"Aww... you've got a bruise on your elbow," Carrie softly cried as she looked at the now black and blue mark forming on Devin's left arm. She gently kissed it and smiled warmly at him. "Better?"

"Better," Devin whispered to her lovingly. He then led her away from the steps and towards the start line, unaware that someone was watching him walk away.

"Hmm... yum, yum," Taylor whispered to herself as she allowed her eyes to glance down at Devin's butt. "Me likey. How the heck did I not notice him last year?"

"Taylor? Sweetie? Are you okay?" Kelly snapped her daughter out of her impure thoughts as she checked her over. "Do you need another anti-bacteria wipe?"

"Huh?! Oh! Uh... no, mom. I'm fine...," Taylor answered, sounding a little happier than usual. But realizing this, she quickly changed her tone. "...though SOMEONE should SERIOUSLY do something about those steps before someone gets hurt!"

"Never fear, milady!" called out a familiar, geeky voice. "Your grand wizard and his faithful partner and bard have arrived to remedy the curse put on these steps!"

Sure enough, **The Larpers Leonard and Tammy** had appeared at the top of the Union Station steps. Though some people in the crowd were laughing at how ridiculous the two looked dressed in their 'Lord of the Rings' attire, they still got a decent reception from the crowd.

"Wait... don't tell me," Don called up, somewhat unamused. "You're going to try to cast a magic spell to lift this supposed curse on these steps, right?"

"Your assumption is correct, my lord," Tammy answered as she and Leonard approached the host. "Now stand back and witness our new abilities and skills we've acquired in the past year!"

The short, plump teenage LARPER then pulled out her signature seashell and held it up to her lips.

"SONG OF MAGICAL ENHANCEMENT!" she cried out. Then, she put the seashell to her mouth and began to play a noisy, yet strangely soothing melody.

"Well done, lady Tammy!" Leonard complimented the bard. "I can feel my powers increasing by the second. I shall now remove the curse from these steps!"

"Oh, this should be good," Don mumbled as he leaned against his podium, bored by the whole act.

The wizard teen then pulled out his signature staff and held it over his head. A mysterious thunder rolled in the background as he focused on the steps.

" **CUMERSE! BEUM! GUMONE! NUMOW!" [2]** his mysteriously powerful voice echoed over the crowd as that mysterious thunder continued to roll overhead. People raised their eyebrows suspiciously. This was either a very good show or the young teenager had indeed learned how to use magic. Even Don seemed a little impressed by this... but just a little.

"And _viola_!" Leonard confidently proclaimed. "The curse has left us! Observe as I- _ **WHOOP!"**_

As good a show Leonard and Tammy had put on, their counter spell appeared to be ineffective. Poor Leonard had tripped over his robes and it was his turn to tumble down the steps to the street below. Some of the contestants were laughing at Leonard's misfortune while others raced over to make sure he was okay.

"And I am not the least bit surprised that happened," Don said aloud to no one. "Tammy, go make sure he's okay... and for your dignity and honor of this contest, try not to let this year be a repeat of last year."

Tammy didn't answer the host. She ran down the steps to make sure her teammate was okay. Mary and Ellody were already on the scene making sure he wasn't seriously hurt.

"Woah! Nasty fall!" came a chilled voice from atop the stairs.

Don turned his attention towards the entrance of Union Station. There stood **The Surfers Geoff and Brody** aka the winners of last year's race. Despite the loud cheers from the audience, the two dudes were more concerned with the well-being of their fellow racing contestant Leonard. They ran past Don and joined Tammy and the two geniuses that were already at his side.

"TOTALLY wicked crash, dude," Geoff said as he knelt down next to the LARPER. "You didn't break anything, did you?"

"Ugh... a good wizard does not break..." Leonard replied somewhat dazed. "...though a wizard knows not to stray too far away from a good healer too... are any of you experienced in white magic?"

"Well, we did take some online medical courses in preparation for university next year when we graduate from high school," Mary answered as Ellody examined him closer. "So I guess we would currently be the best qualified for the job."

"His pupils are properly dilated," Ellody diagnosed. "No ruptures in his skeletal structure. No complications with his speech... he should make a full recovery."

Geoff and Brody just stared blankly at Ellody. Clearly, the two had absolutely no idea what she had just said. Nearby, Mary rolled her eyes.

"He's fine," she dully explained.

"Oh! Cool!" Brody exclaimed excitedly. "Glad to hear it, little wizard dude!"

"Tchyeah! You gotta be on your A game if you're going to compete in this race magical guy!" Geoff added as he playfully punched the LARPER on the shoulder, not knowing he hurt him more than he did encourage.

"Surfers!" Don called over the microphone. "Welcome back to the contest! Glad to see you're still as friendly and sportsmanlike as ever!"

"Of course, dude!" Geoff called back. "It's called good karma! Besides, we won last year by running a clean race and we're gonna do it again this year!"

"Well, that's very noble of you two!" Don complimented. "Kinda boring, but noble."

Meanwhile, Brody had turned his attention to a certain police cadet that had been standing nearby.

"Hey, McArthur," he coolly greeted her. "Did'ja get any of those letters I sent ya?"

"Letters?" McArthur asked, sounding puzzled. "What letters?"

"You know, babe. Those love letters I wrote you all last summer after the first race."

"...I honestly have no idea what you're talking about, kid."

"You don't? Didn't you get, like, a lot of pink envelopes with your name on them? They should have been real easy to notice. Especially since I wrote your name on them in, like, REALLY big letters!"

Sanders, who had been listening to the conversation, knew exactly why her partner hadn't received any of Brody's letters.

"Brody?" Sanders chuckled. "Did you remember to put McArthur's address on those pink envelopes under her name?"

Brody stared at the cadets with a blank expression for a few seconds before his error processed in his mind.

"...Oh yeah!" he laughed while smacking his forehead. "I had a feeling I was forgetting to do SOMETHING."

"...and I'm gonna guess you forgot to put your return address in the upper left hand corner of the envelope and you didn't put a stamp on it either, did you?"

Brody's face had gone blank once more.

"Don't hurt yourself thinking about it too much," McArthur chuckled as she patted the bedazzled surfer gently on the back. "But thanks for making the effort. It's the thought that counts."

Meanwhile, back at the entrance of Union Station, the next team was being introduced. The crowd was quite excited when they noticed the two reality stars make their way down the stairs.

"Say hello to the **Reality Television Pros, Owen and Noah!** Welcome back gentlemen!" Don greeted the two.

"Thanks Don!" Owen excitedly replied while pulling him for one of his infamous bear hugs, ignoring the sound of the host's crushing bones and moans of pain.

Noah didn't bother to stop to greet Don or help him. Instead, he made a straight line for his lawyer girlfriend.

"Hey you," he nonchalantly greeted the Asian law student.

"Hey yourself," Emma replied, grabbing the bookwork by the cuff of his shirt and pulling him in for a kiss that could rival the one Devin gave to Carrie earlier. The crowd responded positively to this and cheered wildly for the reunited couple.

"WHOO!" Kitty cheered for the two loudest of all.

Owen had released Don and ran down to greet his buddies girlfriend and her sister. Once again, he pulled the three of them in for his famous hug. All three victims gasped for air as Owen squeezed them.

"So Emma... you and Noah gonna make kissy kissy this time around?" Owen asked as he released the three of them.

"We'll... (cough) (cough) see (choke)" Emma answered as she gasped for air.

"Wait... what do you mean 'we'll see'?" Noah asked. He didn't like this answer.

"I mean it depends on how we do," Emma replied. "Don't forget that this is still a contest for a million dollars. It's every team for themselves."

"Spoken like the woman I've come to love," Noah sighed as caressed Emma's cheek.

"So... you're okay with that then?" Emma asked, somewhat worried.

"Definitely. After all, there will be plenty of time for kisses and hugs at the chill zones, right?"

"Absolutely," Emma agreed. She then pulled him in for another great kiss.

Nearby, Jay just glared at the scene bitterly. Seeing the scene play out only reminded him more about what Emma had done to him and his brother last season.

Back on the Union Station stairway, Don had regained his breath and was recomposing himself as **The Rockers Rock and Spud** made their grand entrance. Before the team descended the stairs, the stayed on the top for a couple minutes to do an air guitar performance for the crowd, which loved every second of it. To help with the show, a nearby fan of the team began to play the epic Dragon Force song "Through The Fire and Flames" on his radio.

"DUDE! AWESOME SELECTION MAN!" Rock called out, upping the action of his air guitar solo. Spud also upped his air guitar and the two were in a serious jam session. Others in the audience decided they wanted to help out with the show, So in response, they pulled out some fireworks they had brought with them. (Why fans had fireworks with them, no one will ever know) Right as the song neared the big finish, the fans set off those fire works to go along with the amazing finish of the epic song. The fireworks ended right as the song ended, causing the crowd to go wild.

The Rockers then made their way down the steps towards Don.

"Rockers! Welcome back! And congratulations on the most epic entrance of these introductions so far!"

"Thanks dude!" Rock enthusiastically replied. "That was, like TOTALLY unexpected. We were up there like 'de ne ne ne na nuh ne deee duh de neee!' and then people were like 'YEAH! WHOO! ALL RIGHT!'. Then those fireworks went off like 'BANG BOOM POW BLAMMO!'... Yeah! That was epic!"

"Well worded," Don replied dryly. "So anyways, are you two ready for another adventure around the world?"

"...dude... what do you mean 'another'?" Spud asked, seeming spaced out. "This is my first time doing this."

The crowd went silent instantly. So silent that crickets were heard in the background.

"Uh, Spud? Dude? We did this last year. Remember?" Rock asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Spud's eyes remained half-opened as he tried to recollect the adventure from last year. After a moment of what appeared to be hard thinking, Spud's eyes suddenly lit with excitement. "Dude! You mean that WASN'T a dream?! I really DID all that?!"

"...um... yes," Don answered.

"...and you're telling me that I get to do it all again?!"

"Uh... that's why you're here."

"AWESOME!" The heavier rocker pumped his fists into the air in excitement."We're gonna ROCK! THIS! COMPETIT-"

Spud didn't get to finish this phrase as the rocker became the next unfortunate victim of the allegedly cursed staircase. The rocker hadn't been paying attention and missed the step before tumbling down to the streets below. The other competitors, now bored with the whole routine, just casually stepped to the side as Spud crash landed on the streets.

"Can we get a warning sign by this step or something?" Don asked into his earpiece as Rock raced to his teammate's side. "I'd hate to have to send a team home before the race even begins... all right, all right. I'll keep introducing the teams... yes I know there are thirty six teams. Just get that sign over here and I'll introduce the next team."

As Don finished speaking into his earpiece, the next returning team had already arrived at his podium; **The Daters Stephanie and Ryan.**

"Ryan! Stephanie! Welcome back!" Don greeted the two. "So tell us; are you guys going to be the daters? Or the haters this time around?"

"Well, we're still trying to work out a strategy that brings the best of both worlds," Ryan replied as he wrapped his arms around Stephanie from behind.

"Yeah. We're trying to figure out a way that brings out the best in our competitive spirits and our drive to win while keeping the love between us strong," Stephanie added as she caressed Ryan's strong chin.

"Hmm... sounds like my marriage," Don chuckled.

Ryan and Stephanie just gave the host awkward stares. "Uh... you know your wife is most likely watching this right now, right?" Ryan asked.

"No worries, my giant friend. It's a little thing called 'post-production editing'. This will be edited before she even realizes that-"

But his wife had realized. As was evident when Ryan and Stephanie saw the host's earpiece jump to life and bounce around in his ear as a high pitched voice from a woman could be heard screaming in the host's ear, paralyzing him in the process.

"OW! Honey?! You were listening?! I-OW! TOO LOUD! I-OW! No! Of course I didn't forget that you got hired in the control room! Yes I knew you were listening! It was a joke, honey! It was... Oh come on! Don't be like that! Just... hold on, will ya?"

Don quickly turned to the Daters/Haters. "Sorry, this could take some time. Feel free to join the others."

Ryan and Stephanie just shrugged their shoulders as they joined their fellow contestants. Among the first to greet them were Devin and Carrie.

"Hey you two," Carrie beamed as she gave Ryan a big hug. "Glad to see you're getting along well."

"Thanks buddy," Ryan replied as he lifted Carrie into the air in one of his warm embraces. "And thanks for all those letters you've sent me over the past year!"

"Letters?!" Stephanie demanded, seeming upset.

"Pen pals," Devin explained. "Ever since the race ended last year, Carrie and Ryan started writing to one another through the mail."

"I've always wanted to try it," Carrie added as Ryan set her down, "and Ryan was more than willing to write back to me. I think it's a lot more fun than writing to someone via email or Facebook."

"Yeah. It's got a more personal feel to it," Ryan said. "You should try it sometime, babe."

But Stephanie didn't seem to amused by this news. "And WHEN were you going to tell me you were writing her?!" she demanded.

Ryan seemed somewhat nervous by his girlfriend's sudden anger. "I-I thought I already had," he quickly explained.

But Stephanie wasn't listening. She had turned her focus to Devin. "Did YOU know about this?!"

"Um... yes?" Devin answered, not sure if it was the right one to give her at the moment. "I even threw in a couple letters of my own along with Carrie's."

Stephanie's rage was slowly building again. She turned back towards Ryan with a disgusted look on her face. "A whole year of sending letters to these two... and you DIDN'T TELL ME?!"

But Stephanie taking the time to talk to Devin gave the muscular man time to form a plan in his head to ease her rage. The big guy stood calmly, but firmly in front if his girlfriend with his arms crossed and spoke gently to her.

"You're absolutely right, honey," he calmly spoke. "It was very inconsiderate of me to not inform you of my writing hobby with someone else. Especially since that someone else is another girl that I have formed a good friendship with over the past year. I will try to inform you of these kinds of activities from now on."

Stephanie opened her mouth to retort, but couldn't find any words to say.

"But... I... UGH! I HATE it when you do that!" she snapped as she stomped her feet.

"I know," Ryan chuckled as he pulled her in for a gentle hug.

"Heh... you're not jealous of Ryan writing letter to little ol' me, are you?" Carrie chuckled nervously.

"NO!" Stephanie immediately snapped. Then, realizing her tone, she took a deep breath and calmed herself down. "I mean... no. It's just... I wish you would have told me because... I might have wanted to send Carrie and Devin a letter too, ya know?"

"Well, I'll do my best to remember these things from now on," Ryan said. Then, without warning, he bent her over and gave her a kiss right on the lips, which earned cheers from the crowd.

"Aw, they're so cute when they're like that," Carrie cooed.

"Hey Carrie! Uh... I mean... **hey Carrie."**

The sound of a younger voice caught Carrie's attention. The blonde haired friend turned around and was greeted by a boy in his early teens. She instantly recognized the bushy blonde hair hiding under the signature red hat.

"Hey Junior!" she greeted the young boy. "It's great to see you again!"

But before Junior could reply, his wildest dreams came true as Carrie had pulled him in for a hug. To say Junior's face turned red would have been an understatement. A great, goofy smile had spread on his face. He wanted that moment to last forever, but unfortunately for Junior, it would not. Carrie let him go and was now looking down on the young man that had formed a crush on her.

"So how have you been?" Carrie asked.

"Great!" Junior excitedly replied. But then, realizing the high pitch in his voice, he quickly cleared his throat and answered again in his 'deep' voice. "I mean... **great."**

"Junior?! Where are you little buddy?!"

Junior cringed as he heard his father call out to him. Indeed, Dwayne was standing next to Don by the podium. The host had just finished having his wife yell at him and was now trying to introduce **Father and Son Dwayne and Junior**

"He's already joined his fellow racing contestants," Don answered. "The little guy was so looking forward to seeing his friends again."

"Oh," Dwayne replied somewhat somberly. But he quickly chuckled it off. "Well, you know kids. They try to grow up so fast. But this father's still got what it takes to be just as cool as his son's friends! But that's beside the point I suppose. I'm just happy that I get to spend another whole summer with my son."

"Another WHOLE summer, huh? So are you making a prediction that you and your son are going to win this time?" Don asked.

"Oh you bet!" Dwayne excitedly replied. "This time, my son and I are going to go the distance and win this whole thing! And like the old saying goes: The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single ste- **WOAH! WAH!"**

Unfortunately for Dwayne, his first step of this journey had begin with him tripping and being the next victim of the dreaded staircase. The middle-aged man cried out in pain with every step he hit before he landed on the streets at his son's feet.

"Dad?! Are you okay?" Junior asked worriedly.

"...I'll... I'll be fine..." his father groaned.

"I'm starting to think the grand entrance on the steps of Union Station was a bad idea," Don said as he stared at the wreckage below. "Anyways, it's time to introduce the final returning team of this years race! Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the meat eating V **egans, Laurie and Miles**!"

At their cue, Laurie and Miles came out of Union station and made their way towards the cheering crowd. Miles waved happily to the fans. But Laurie, however, did not appear to be as enthusiastic. In fact, she seemed rather cross about being there. Her expression did not change as she and her teammate reached Don.

"So ladies," Don greeted, "you're another team that didn't fare off too well last year. Any new strategies that you think will help you this time around?"

Laurie just continued to glare at the host, making him somewhat unnerved.

"Ugh... she's not going to pounce me again, is she?" Don whispered to Miles.

"I honestly don't know," Miles whispered back. "Ever since last year when she ate that meat and got eliminated, she hasn't been herself. Her aura feels... off. Very gray and gloomy."

Laurie didn't even bother to respond. The hippie just marched down to the street and took her place at the starting line, ignoring the other contestants in the process.

"Um.. well then, good luck with that," Don said as he let Miles go down to check on her eerily quiet friend. "And there you go ladies and gentlemen! Your eighteen returning teams for this year's Ridonculous Race!"

Despite the somber mood of the last team, the crowd cheered wildly for the eighteen teams that had taken their place at the starting line on the street. Most of the contestants soaked in the cheers, which pumped them up for the race even more. (The only one that didn't seem very excited was Laurie)

"But save your energy ladies and gentlemen," the host continued. "Because as previously mentioned, we're having double the teams this year! So then... who's ready to meet the eighteen new teams?!"

By round of applause, it was confirmed that everyone, audience members and contestants alike, were ready to meet these new teams.

"Tchyeah!" Geoff cheered. "I love it! After all, strangers are friends that you haven't met. And I LOVE meeting friends."

"Awesome!" Carrie added.

"I look forward to the competition," Sanders said.

"I look forward to crushing that said competition," Josee and McArthur said at the same time, which in turn caused the two to stare at one another intensely once again.

"Our first new team are somewhat similar to the Daters/Haters and the Daters/Best Friends," Don announced. "The only two differences that I can see so far though is that unlike the two teams mentioned, these two have been dating for nearly five years! So our veterans are rookies compared to these rookies in the ways of dating. Also, these two thrive on being in the great outdoors! Riding horseback, fishing, hunting, four-wheeling, you name it!. So please join me in welcoming our first new team, the **Outdoor Survivalists Jamie and Jason!"**

When announced, a young couple in their early twenties made their grand entrance from Union Station hand in hand. The crowd cheered as the rookies waved to them and made their way to Don, not letting go of the others hand.

"Jamie. Jason," the host greeted. "Feel free to tell the audience a little about yourselves."

"It would be our pleasure," Jason replied, adjusting his purple, sports jacket. "Jamie and I I first met when I moved from my old town and started at the same school as hers. On my first day, she was the one who gave me the tour."

"During the tour, he said he was looking for work, so I invited him over to my parent's house for an interview as a stable keeper," Jamie continued as she twirled her unusually long, brown ponytail in her finger. "You see, I live on a horse ranch with my mom and dad. I LOVE horses and convinced them to give him the job. We worked together for awhile before... well, before we hooked up." Jamie finished by giving Jason a gentle kiss on the cheek.

People in the audience cooed and awed at the couple's story and public showing of affection towards one another.

"Aw, isn't that sweet," Don replied, wiping a tear from his eye. "It's almost beautiful enough to write a book about... but it would need some more action like an apocalyptic setting with bandits and creatures of destruction or something like that. **{3}** Anyways, glad to have you here. Please go join the others on the street below."

"Will do Don," Jason answered as he escorted his sweetheart down to the street. But on the way down, Don noticed Jason's hand in his pocket. The young man was definitely fiddling with something in there. But what it was he couldn't tell. Anyways, the host didn't have time to contemplate what it could be as the next team had arrived at the podium.

" **Joe! Fiona! The Opposites!** **[4]** Welcome to the Ridonculous Race," Don greeted them.

These two individuals didn't look as though they were on the same team. They weren't even dressed in matching clothes like most of the other teams were. The bright green eyed Fiona appeared to be a beautiful, young hippie with beautiful, long, blonde hair wearing short jeans, a pale peach colored dress, a headband made of vines, and a warm smile. Joe, on the other hand, had the most unusually styled silver hair that anyone had ever seen. It seemed to grow straight out the sides of his heads. And unlike Fiona's more exotic wardrobe, Joe wore a plain, gray sweatshirt, plain blue jeans, and plain, white sneakers.

"So the producers have labeled you two as The Opposites," Don probed. "Fiona, the modern-day hippie. And Joe, the self-labeled retro geek. Tell the audience about that."

"Well you see, Don," Fiona gently spoke as she placed a hand on Joe's shoulder. "My dear friend here is what I like to call a late blooming flower. I met him one night while walking through the woods. He appeared to be somewhat distraught over something, so like an orphaned little puppy, I approached him. Sure enough, his aura gave off a depressing shade of blue. He was lonely, hurt, and had almost no friends in this world. So, having a weakness for puppies myself, I adopted him."

"Uh... you ADOPTED him?" Don questioned. "How can you adopt someone that's the same age as you? Let alone at eighteen years of age?"

"Not literally," Joe quickly explained. "See, she brought me into her social circle of friends and, for some reason or another, decided to make it her mission to 'help me bloom into the beautiful flower she knows I am' as she puts it."

"And once he does Don, he is going to be the most beautiful, rare flower of all. And I'm sure that this race is going to help him blossom," Fiona finished.

"Fiona, do you really have to call me a flower?" Joe grumbled.

"Well, what shall I call you then sweetie?"

"I don't know. Something that sounds cool! Like... like a lone, samurai warrior!" Now Joe was looking off in the distance with an intense and excited look on his face. "Wandering the earth, alone and determined to discover his true, inner self and seeking redemption for the failures of his past! His struggles making him stronger and more experienced for the next battle that he must engage in!"

The exciting image of being a samurai warrior had Joe lost in his own daydream. In fact, he had almost taken the same pose as a samurai warrior as he described his vision.

But unfortunately, the moment was ruined as Fiona pinched his cheek.

"Aw, you're such a cute, little puppy," she cooed.

Joe grimaced as Fiona pinched his cheek and called him something cute as opposed to something strong and mighty. Without another word, Joe marched down to the streets as Fiona followed.

"Hey now, don't let it get you down, sport," McArthur greeted the visibly upset dork. "At least she cares about your well-being."

"Yeah... she certainly does," Joe replied, his expression softening as he looked over at his friend warmly.

"That's the spirit, pup. You're such a good boy," McArthur added with a chuckle. Then, to add salt to the wound, she started rubbing his unusual silver hair while.

Before Fiona reached her teammate and friend, she came across the veteran vegans. Immediately, she sensed the gloomy aura coming off of Laurie.

"Oh dear. What's the matter with her?" Fiona asked Miles.

"Uh... I'll explain it later," Miles replied.

The new hippie girl held a worried hand to her bottom lip as she looked over at the depressed Laurie. She certainly didn't appear to be the same individual that she watched back last year. Something was definitely wrong. But she didn't have time to contemplate on this as the next new team was being introduced.

Making their entrance into the streets of Toronto from Union Station was a duo of extremely well-dressed individuals. One was an older-looking gentleman in a fully dressed business suit that included a dark blue jacket over a white shirt, red tie, and matching pants and dress shoes. His teammate was a much younger looking woman with dark, red hair. Her beauty was complimented by the tight, short, strapless red dress she wore that showed off her generous curves, luscious legs, and endowed chest. The two properly approached the host at the podium while properly waving to the crowd.

"Next we have the **father/daughter business tycoons, Lauren and Donald**! **[5]** " Don announced. "Uh, you don't mind that I call you Donald instead of Don, do you?"

"Certainly not," Donald responded as he straightened his tie. "After all, it does my image no good if I'm constantly being compared to someone else of lesser value on this show."

"Indeed not," the host retorted, somewhat irritated by this remark. "If I may ask you a couple questions before you join the others? First of all, what's with your choice of clothing? It looks more like you're ready to go to work, not run a race. And Lauren, I don't think you'll be able to run very fast in that dress and those heels."

"It's all about the mindset of success," Donald answered. "One must constantly dress for success if one is to succeed in the cut throat world of business. Do you seriously believe that anyone would cheer for us if we were to appear on this show dressed up like slobs like some of our fellow contestants? ….no offense intended, mind you."

The rest of the contestants just glared back at the older gentleman. They didn't take too kindly to being called slobs.

"Not to mention that it's proven that the better dressed you are, the more likely you are to win supporters and motivate people to get behind you," Lauren added as she brushed her hair aside. "You know the old saying: sex sells."

"...and you think that just by dressing for success and dressing with a little sex appeal, that will gain you supporters?"

"Watch and learn, Don," Lauren confidently replied. Then, without another word, she seductively brushed her dark red hair to the side and winked at the audience. The reaction from every male in the audience as well as some of the females proved her theory.

"Oh baby! I hope she sticks around!"

"What a sexy babe!"

"Can we form an alliance with her?" Lorenzo asked Chet

"You bet!" Chet excitedly replied, his eyes focused solely on the femme fetale.

Don was shocked to say the least as he watched Lauren attract attention for herself.

"I believe my daughter has proven her point," Donald chuckled.

"They don't call me the most successful business owner under the age of thirty because I'm JUST a pretty face," Lauren added with a chuckle. "Believe it or not, there's a brain under this fabulous hair. And it's ITCHING to make my family's business more successful."

Lauren brushed the hair out of her eyes and made her way down to the starting line. Then, after straightening his tie once more, Donald casually made his way down to join his daughter.

"Huh... I guess you can't argue with results," Don said aloud to no one. "But moving on, I would like to introduce you all to our second team of reality television pros! Like Noah and Owen, they've competed on numerous reality shows together including the hit series Total Drama. "

Down below, Devin's eyes lit up with excitement. As did Junior's eyes. Both had been big fans of the show.

"I hope it's Bridgette and Cody," Junior whispered to Devin.

Devin chuckled and repeated the conversation he had earlier with Don as he and Carrie were introduced. It was almost heartbreaking to watch the the smile disappear from the young teen's face as he learned they would not be competing.

"So without further ado, it is my pleasure to welcome to The Ridonculous Race... **The Reality Show Rivals, Leshawna and Tyler**!"

The crowd went wild as the two celebrity contestants came out of Union Station side by side.

"What's up, y'all!" Leshawna called out with her hand on her hips.

"Yeah! We're ready to rock!" Tyler added, pumping his fists into the air.

Down below, some of the contestants were excited to see these two pioneers of reality television. Particularly Owen and Geoff.

"WHOO!" Geoff and Owen cheered together.

"Oh joy," Noah rolled his eyes. Unlike the other two former Total Drama contestants, he wasn't as thrilled to see these two. After all, both had been former teammates of his and both had played a role in voting him off in each season he competed in.

Meanwhile, Leshawna and Tyler had joined Don.

"So. Leshawna. Tyler. You've both already competed together and against one another on a lot of reality shows including, but not limited to, _Doctor For A Day, Extreme Chess, So You Think You Can Eat That,_ and of course, _Total Drama Island/World Tour._ Do you guys think that your experience in working together and competing against each other on so many reality shows together will give you two an advantage in this contest?"

"You'd better believe it, sugar," Leshawna answered. "And to the other teams in this race; we love y'all and wish y'all luck, but y'all better bring your A-game. Because we came to win!"

"Definitely!" Tyler added, standing tall and proud. "With our skills and experience, we are definitely going to be the team to beat! Brace yourselves fellow contestants! Because this time, Tyler and Leshawna are going all the w- **WAUGH!"**

Poor Tyler had become so excited that he had lost track where his feet were. And the reality jock became the next reality contestant to tumble down the steps of Union Station.

"Heh. Some things never change," Noah chuckled as Tyler landed at the bottom of the steps with his partner in hot pursuit.

Geoff and Owen were already there to help the jock to his feet by the time his partner reached him.

"Tyler! Leshawna! Great to see you two again," Geoff greeted.

"You too, sugar," Leshawna greeted back as she threw Tyler's arms over her to support her dazed partner.

"...yeah... good to see ya... bro," Tyler replied, still in his daze.

"Now don't you two think we're gonna go easy on ya," Leshawna teased. "Once this race starts, it's every team for themselves."

"Wouldn't expect anything less from you," Geoff pleasantly replied.

"WHOO! We're all gonna be racing together! I'm so EXCITED!" Owen cheered. Then, for old times sake, Owen scooped Leshawna, Tyler, and Geoff into his arms for one of his famous hugs. And, just like those old times, bones could be heard crunching as Owen squeezed his friends.

Just then, the reunion was interrupted by the sound of loud, revving engines approaching the Union Station streets. People in the audience could be seen moving aside as two motorcycles made their way past people and towards the starting line. Once both motorcycles reached the starting line, the riders on each bike revved their engines once more for show. The trick worked and the audience cheered wildly for the mysterious bikers.

"Oh... they look tough, don't they?" McArthur whispered to Sanders and Joe simultaneously.

"Do we have to compete against them?!" Joe shivered. "They look dangerous."

"Aw, don't wet yourself, kid," McArthur reassured the newbie as she slapped him on the back (unknowingly knocking the breath out of Joe). "Think of it as the ultimate challenge."

Meanwhile, the two bikers, still wearing their full biker uniforms and helmets, walked up to Don at the podium. One biker was more muscular and average height. The other was smaller, but the biker's actions seemed to show that this individual had a LOT of energy. Once they reached Don, both cricked their necks and awaited the host to speak.

"Ah, I thought you two wouldn't be able to resist making an impression on the audience," he laughed.

"Well, what did ya expect, sonny?! Ya only get one chance ta make a first impressio, right?!" the shorter biker said.

Everyone, audience and contestants alike, gasped as they heard one of the mystery bikers speak .

"Iz... iz dat biker... an old woman?!" Jacques whispered to Josse, who looked equally shocked.

To answer everyone's questions, the two bikers removed their helmets and confirmed everyone's suspicions. Underneath those helmets were the faces of two old ladies that appeared to be no younger than eighty years old.

"Welcome to the Ridonculous Race **Cindy and Anna aka The Tough Grannies** ," Don greeted the two elder ladies.

"Glad ta be here," Cindy, the taller and bulkier of the two women, replied. "The question here is do ya think the other contestants here will be able to keep up with us?"

"Well we are known for attracting the best competitors in the world," Don retorted.

"Bah! Rubbish!" Anna retorted. "These young whipper-snappers don't look like they could keep up with a wild bucklin' bronco!" Despite Anna's frail appearance, she sounded more energetic and feisty than anyone else in attendance that day. "Why, they probably haven't even done their three hundred sit-ups this morning!"

"Did she just zay... dree hundred?" Jacques shuddered. Even he and Josse could only pull off a hundred sit-ups at once. And that was when they were fresh and rested.

"Well, I'm sure they'll all love to have the opportunity to prove you both wrong," Don chuckled. "Good luck to you both."

"Bah! Only wussies need luck!" Anna barked back before throwing her biker gear on the steps and marching back down to the starting line.

"My... she's a feisty one, isn't she," Don whispered to Cindy.

"Ah, don't let her frighten ya, sonny," Cindy assured the host. "But just the same, I's be careful not to get on her bad side. Ya might be wishin' for help from a less scary individual: a politician. HA HA HA!"

Then, while laughing at her own joke, she threw her biker clothes on the ground alongside her partner's, she followed after Anna while whistling an upbeat tempo tune.

"...I like those two," McArthur whispered to Sanders. But neither Sanders or Joe appeared to share her enthusiasm.

"Okay then," Don continued. "Now that that's over with, let's move on to the next pair! Junior! I seem to recall you wishing there was someone else in the race that was around your age! Am I correct?"

Junior's eyes lit up as the host addressed him.

"Well this year, your wish has been granted! Representing a charity program that I myself hold very dear to my heart, I am very proud to present to you a team that will be representing the Big Brother Program! **Total Drama All Star DJ and fourteen year old Ryan; The Big Brother Participants**!"

The crowd cheered as the next team emerged from Union Station. Everyone immediately recognized the gentle giant DJ as he waved to the crowd. Geoff and Leshawna were especially excited to see their old friend again. Standing next to DJ was a much smaller, black teenage boy. But unlike DJ, he didn't appear to pay much attention to the audience as he was more focused on the book he had brought with him.

"Psst! Ry-Ry," DJ whispered to him. "We're up little buddy."

Ryan, or Ry-Ry as DJ called him, immediately looked up from his book. When he saw where they were, he let out a small gasp and hid behind his mentor.

"Deej," he whimpered, "you didn't tell me there would be so many people here."

DJ chuckled and patted his younger teammate on the head. "Well, what can I say? This is a big event. And we're a part of it now little buddy. So what say we introduce you to the world?"

Ry-Ry peaked out from behind DJ somewhat timidly. Slowly, but surely, the cheering crowd boosted his confidence. Soon enough, he bravely stepped out from behind DJ and waved back to the crowd.

"Oh... isn't that the sweetest thing you've ever seen?" Stephanie cooed to her boyfriend, the much larger and older Ryan.

"Sure is, babe," Ryan smiled. "Just a shame he and I share the same name because I get the feeling that people are going to remember THAT Ryan more than me."

"Oh... I wouldn't quite go that far," Stephanie grinned as she held her man close to her. "...although he IS quite adorable."

DJ and the much younger Ryan were now being greeted by the host.

"Dj. Ryan. ...or should we call you Ry-Ry?"

"Ry-Ry's fine," Ry-Ry replied.

"Very well. Ry-Ry it is! Anyways, I don't think there's anything else I can add to that introduction other than to represent your program proudly with honor, integrity, and diligence!"

"Will do, sir," DJ replied as he shook the host's hand. But when the gentle giant went to pull his hand away, he found that the host held his grip. Then, without warning, he pulled DJ in close and whispered something into his ear that only he could hear.

"Seriously though, don't let this organization down," Don harshly whispered. "I'm not just saying this program is close to my heart for show. You dishonor the Big Brother Program and I will see to it that you never appear on any reality program again. Understand?"

With a heavy gulp. DJ nodded his head in agreement.

"Good. Well then, good luck to you both!"

DJ, suddenly very somber, led Ry-Ry down the steps towards the starting line. His spirits lifted when he was greeted by Leshawna, Geoff, and Owen. The three were also very welcoming of Ry-Ry. As were most of the other contestants.

While DJ and Ry-Ry were being welcomed, the next team had already made their entrance and were joining Don at the podium. This team composed of two men that appeared to be in their early thirties. Judging by their size, the two spent a lot of their time in the gym lifting weights. The wore matching black tank tops, matching cameo pants, and both had shaved their heads bald. One was Caucasian, a little more bulky, and had about five inches on this partner, who was black and was built more muscular.

"I would advise all of our contestants to not try any underhanded schemes with these two around," Don called out to the other teams on the streets. "Because this year we're being joined by **The Bouncers, Marcus and Devon**. And these two are not afraid to take matters into their own hands. Right gentlemen?"

Marcus, the larger of the bouncers, responded by snatching the microphone from Don's podium. He then turned to the other contestants.

"Question! Which one of you teams are the ice dancers?" he called out.

Josee and Jacques raised their hands nonchalantly, not looking very impressed with the new team.

"Step up here for a second," Marcus continued.

The ice dancers gave one another confused looks at first. But then shrugging their shoulders, they walked up to the Bouncers next to the podium. The size of Marcus was a little intimidating to say the least. Jacques was no small man and was known for his upper body strength, but Marcus had a couple inches on him and appeared to be even more built than the ice dancer. Devon, despite being a little shorter, appeared to be a lot stronger too.

Though Jacques looked somewhat nervous, Josee remained unimpressed.

"You're the two that caused a lot of trouble for the other teams last season, aren't ya?" Marcus asked looking down at Josee.

Josee, her arms folded and an quirking her eyebrow, just looked up at Marcus.

"Yeah, I suppose we are," she casually answered. "What's it to you two gorilla-looking-"

A sudden gagging noise silenced Josee. Devon, who had been silent the while time, had suddenly reached over with one arm, grabbed hold of Jacques by the throat, and lifted him effortlessly into the air. Jacques face immediately turned blue as he struggled to no avail to break free from Devon's grip.

"Hey!" Josee barked. "Let him go you-"

Devon growled at Josee, not breaking his hold of Jacques. His menacing glare alone forced Josee to back away from him.

"Don! Do something! Stop them!" she ordered the host.

However, Don was hiding behind his podium, too scared to even try to say anything.

"YOU make them stop!" Don retorted.

As Devon held a gagging Jacques high above the ground, Marcus turned his attention to the rest of the contestants down at the street.

"All right, everybody listen up! Because I'm only going to say this once!" he roared , causing the other teams to jump. "Me and my brother from another mother Devon are here to run a clean, honorable race! So if any of you's decide to try to screw us or any of the other teams over with your shenanigans, you're gonna deal with me and my brother!"

Among the contestants, Mickey and Jay were holding onto one another, shaking in pure terror. Tom and Jen were clinging onto one another, equally as scared. Elsewhere, Joe had found Fiona and the retro dork was hiding behind the modern hippie.

"And let me warn you two right now!" Marcus continued. "You may think you're tough and all that just because you ran this race last year. But let me inform you of who WE are! I'm Marcus! He's Devon! We're Bouncers! And together we've stopped the craziest of club riots! So if you think you're going to get away with any of that crap this year, you'd better think again! Because if you, or anyone else for that matter, try to scheme and cheat your way to victory, we're going to be all over you like a male dog on a female dog in heat! And I promise you, it's NOT going to be US that gets hurt!"

To emphasize the point, Devon lifted Jacques higher off the ground, still with one hand. The ice dancer's face was becoming more and more blue by the second.

Carrie squealed in terror as she hid behind Devin. DJ and Tyler found themselves trying to hide behind one another as Marcus threatened the other teams.

"We've done our jobs and given you all fair warning!" the bouncer began to wrap up. "Now it's up to you all to remember our words! Because this race WILL end badly for anyone who forgets our warning!"

Marcus then handed the microphone over to his, as he put it, brother from another mother Devon. The muscular black bouncer, while still holding Jacques by his throat alone, just looked out among the other teams with a fierce glare. That was all he had to do. The racers got the message from his glare alone.

But because he and Marcus were both somewhat shows-men, Devon lifted the microphone to his mouth and proclaimed his four favorite words to the contestants and fans alike:

" **OH, MY BROTHER! TESTIFY!"**

The crowd, despite being terrified by what they had just witnessed, roared with excitement. Devon then dropped Jacques to the ground, who immediately began to gasp for air. Josee quickly ran to his side and helped him to his feet.

"Glad we understand!" Marcus snapped. "Now get out of our way, you pencil-necked geeks!"

Devon tossed the microphone back to Don and the bouncers pushed the ice dancers aside and made their way to the starting line. Needless to say, not a single team dared to stand in their way.

"Uh... all right then," Don shivered. "Didn't think there would be any other teams that could scare me as much as the goths, but I was wrong." Josee helped Jacques back down to the starting line, still shaken by what had happened.

"Anyways, let's meet our next team! Another contestant from Total Drama fame, this contestant is the first competitor to compete in this race from Revenge of the Island! Bringing along his fellow marine cadet, please welcome **The Marine Cadets Brick and Emily!** "

The said marines made their entrance at Union Station to a nice reception from the audience. Brick didn't appear to have changed much. He still wore his clothes that he had from Revenge of the Island s well as his military buzz cut. As the crowd cheered, he saluted them in response.

His partner Emily was about six inches shorter than he was. She wore a white tank top, cameo jeans, army boots, and wore a camouflage headband around her forehead. She also appeared to have some Latin heritage as her skin was slightly darker than Brick's and was complimented by her long, black hair. Like Brick, she took a moment to give a military salute to the crowd.

"Whoo! I was hoping I'd get to compete against him one day!" Tyler cheered. "Now's the chance!"

"Tch'yeah," Brody agreed. "That guy's, like, a hero!"

"Absolutely," Jamie nearby added. "I've always respected men who are willing to serve in the military... like my brother." She sighed longingly as she watched Brick and Emily approach Don.

"So Brick. You've been absent from reality television for a couple years now. What made you finally decide to come back to it?"

"Well Don, part of it has to do with my dream of going to fashion school," Brick explained. "And unlike Total Drama, which seemed to revolve more around scheming and manipulating, this contest is based solely on skill and determination. And with that skill and determination, I'm confident that my platoon's leader Emily and I will have no problem winning this race. Isn't that right partner?"

Emily gave Brick a most dirty look as he said this to her. Brick gasped, quickly realizing his mistake, and immediately stood in the position of attention.

"Uh, I mean... Ma'am! With your leadership and my determination, this mission will end with success. Ma'am!"

"Affirmative cadet," Emily replied with a faint smile. "And I have every faith that our teamwork will see us through to victory."

"Well, I certainly look forward to you two competing this year! Now if you'll please, go join the other contestants down at the starting line."

"Will do sir- **GWAGH!"**

Unfortunately, just as Brick's appearance hadn't changed, neither had his coordination. The cadet was just as accident prone as ever and proved it once again by falling down the Union Station steps to the starting line.

"Ouch!" Joe cringed as Brick hit his head on the streets. "I think he had the nastiest fall to date!"

"Bah! Shake it off ya big baby!" Anna cried out.

"Is he all right?" Jamie cried out as she raced over to check on Brick.

The brown-haired girl carefully turned Brick over on his back to see if he was still conscious. The cadet was, but his eyes appeared to be rolling around his head.

"...derrp... auntie Em? Is that you?" he dreamily asked. "...you sure have lotz of starz floating around your head..."

"Oh dear!" Jamie gasped. "He may have seriously hurt himself! We should call an ambulance!"

"No need for that," a rather calm Emily assured as she casually approached Brick. "Allow me to handle this."

The female cadet casually cleared her throat. Then, with a loud, stern voice, she exclaimed:

" **Ten-HUT!"**

Instantly, Brick shot up from the ground and was standing in the position of attention as if he hadn't just hit his head on the concrete street much to everyone's surprise.

Emily continued speaking as she circled her partner.

"As your commanding officer for the duration of this contest, I hereby order that you will refrain yourself from hitting your head on the streets like that again. Also, you will keep yourself from getting knocked into a senseless state and worrying your fellow contestants like that ever again! Do I make myself clear?!"

"MA'AM! YES MA'AM!" Brick loudly replied.

"Good! Now apologize to the young lady here for worrying her!" Emily ordered.

On command, Brick turned to Jamie, saluted her, and spoke in his military tone.

"Ma'am! The recruit is sincerely sorry for causing you concern over my clumsiness and will refrain from ever worrying you like that again!"

Jamie just stared blankly at Brick. She had heard that those in the army were specifically trained to follow orders or else, but this was rather extreme.

"Well done recruit!" Emily complimented. "At ease!"

Brick relaxed and just waited as the next team was being announced.

Joining Don at the podium were two younger men who appeared to be about ninteen or twenty years old. One was taller and built, wearing a white sleeveless shirt and cameo pants while the other was smaller, scrawny, and wore a green t-shirt with a lightning bolt on it.

" **The Roommates, Aaron and Greg!** Welcome gentlemen," Don greeted.

"Yeah, cut the formalities, will ya?" Greg retorted. "Now where's the restrooms. I've got a brown dog barking at my back door if you know what I mean."

Don grimaced at the image Greg had painted for him. "A little less information like that would be appreciated in the future," Don shuddered. "If you need to go, there's plenty of port-a-potties down on the street for this event."

"Yeah, no thanks," Greg replied. "If I wanted to use one of those crappers, I'd go back to the Wild West. So go ahead and, you know, shove that idea right back up your ass. I'm going back in the station to use a clean bathroom. You know, like a human."

Without waiting for a response, Greg went back inside Union Station to find said restroom, leaving behind a highly annoyed Aaron to chat with the host.

"You'll have to forgive him," a mortified Aaron said. "He doesn't have a filter between his mouth and his brain."

"It's called having the balls to say what no one else has the balls to say!" Greg called back before disappearing into Union Station.

Again, Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Sheesh, he sounds like a handful. Why the heck are you partners with a guy like HIM?"

"Because he had the video camera to submit an audition and said I couldn't use it unless I allowed him to be my partner for the race," Aaron explained, sounding very unimpressed while reminiscing on the memory.

"Damn right," Greg said as he rejoined Don and Aaron.

"Um... that was rather quick Greg," Don said, somewhat confused. "I thought you had to use the bathroom."

"Oh, false alarm," Greg replied. "It was just gas... though I wouldn't go up there for a little while if I were you. That'll knock a buzzard off a cactus, if you know what I mean."

"All too well sadly," Don replied, disgusted. "Now for the love of all that is decent, get out of here."

"Ah, whatever." Greg just shrugged his shoulders and made his way down the steps. A mortified Aaron, his hand over his face in embarrassment, just followed him to the streets. Every time Greg passed by a team, he would either ask "The hell you looking at?" or "Hey babe! When you wanna hook up and do it?" Despite the question, Aaron apologized on behalf of his teammate.

Back on Union Station, Don was greeting the next team. Two young ladies wearing matching cheerleader outfits and holding their noses in disgust approached Don at the podium.

"Ugh! What WAS that awful smell?! Can't you control your gassy stomach for a day Samey?!"

"Amy, it wasn't ME!" Sammy snapped. "And stop calling me 'Samey'!"

"Relax ladies," Don intervened. "It was our last team. Let's just say I'm convinced one of them is a pig in disguise."

"Yeah, I'm sure," Amy retorted. "Producers probably told you to say that just so Samey here wouldn't look like an idiot on National Television."

"Actually, it WAS my partner!" Aaron called up. And the rest of us can testify to that!"

"Hell, I'll testify to it too," Greg added. "No way I'm denying a powerful smell like that one. That was a thing of beauty! Peel paint right off a building it will! Probably gagged a maggot or two. Who doesn't love their own brand, am I right partner?"

Aaron sighed and just continued to rub his forehead.

'My partner is a Neanderthal,' he whispered to himself.

"Anyways, ladies, welcome to the Ridonculous Race," Don greeted **Amy and Sammy, the Identical Twins**. "Now Amy. Sammy. I'm told you competed on Pahkitew Island and as a result of your constant arguing and bickering, your parents are forcing you to compete on this show again as punishment for embarrassing them, am I right?"

"No, it isn't" Amy snapped before Sammy could speak. "It's because SAMEY here can't let go of the fact that I'm the better twin!"

"What?! That's not true! It's because you're a controlling, manipulative bitch! And STOP! CALLING! ME! SAMEY!"

"Why should I?" Amy taunted. "Everyone else calls you Samey!"

"Actually," Don interrupted, reading his papers, "According to the submission form, her legal name is Sammy. So therefore, that's the one we're gonna go with."

"Whatever. Only reason it says on the form is because it's on her birth certificate. And that's because mom and dad wouldn't let the doctors fill in the more accurate name, which is Samey because she tries to the exact same as my, the better twin!"

With a great cry, Sammy tackled her twin sister, sending the two tumbling down the steps to the streets below. Even when they landed, they didn't stop fighting. They rolled around and tugged at one another's hair.

"I feel like we went through this last season," Don said, scratching his head.

"Shouldn't someone stop them?" Aaron exclaimed as the twin sisters scratched at one another.

"Why?!" Greg demanded. "Two hot chicks fighting. This is amazing! Someone! Get me some popcorn!"

Cindy and Anna went over and grabbed a twin each.

"Settle down fire crackers!" Anna demanded. "And save it for the race!"

"Why?! I don't even want to race with her!" Amy barked.

"Same here!" Sammy agreed. "Why should I even try to get along with that conniving, hateful spawn of evil?!"

"Ya dumb kids and your emotions!" Cindy huffed. "Didn'tcha forget the million dollar prize for the winning team?! You REALLY wanna give that up over a petty argument?!"

At that, the two girls ceased trying to grab at one another. The tough grannies were right. A million dollars at the end of this would be worth the struggle of having to tolerate one another... for now. Once they felt the twins had settled down, Cindy and Anna let them go.

"Whatever," Amy huffed. "Just follow my lead and try not mess up."

Sammy just rolled her eyes and didn't even respond. She turned her back to her sister and ignored her for the remainder of the introductions.

"Dammit. Just when it was getting hot too," Greg huffed.

"Put a clamp on it, you pig!" Came a new voice from Union Station steps.

Everyone's attention turned back to the podium where two young ladies that appeared to be in their early twenties had now joined Don. And like the twins before them, they were holding their noses from the smell of Greg's fart earlier.

"Oh boy, another farting machine. Just what I've always wanted," Noah dryly said to no one in particular.

"And we DON'T appreciate you relieving your bodily gases out in public like that!" spoke the blonde-haired teammate. "Have some decency, you pig!"

"THANK YOU!" Aaron called up.

"And you! Find a way to keep your partner in line!" demanded the brunette teammate. "You're just as guilty for that as he is!"

"What?! How-But I-"

" **Amie and Rachel, The Activists.** Welcome to the show!" Don greeted. "I understand you're very passionate about... um... equality?"

"That is right Don," Rachel, the brunette answered.

"We are here to continue to fight for equality for all people out there," Amie continued. "That's why all of our money that we win from this contest will go to all people who are in need of it. So that everyone has the same equal rights! And no one is left behind in famine and despair."

"Aww, how disgustingly unselfish of you," Don replied. "Now go join the others at the starting line."

Rachel and Amie did as they were instructed and made their way to join the other contestants. As they passed them, they strangely ignored all the boys that were there, but happily greeted the girls.

As Rachel passed by some of the girls that were dating, she whispered things to them like "You don't need him", "Trust me, you're better off without him controlling you" or "Be independent and show you're stronger without him."

Emma, Carrie, Stephanie, and Jamie just glared as Rachel whispered these things to them.

Back at the podium, another team, holding their noses from the wretched smell that still lingered at the top of the steps, had joined Don. These two young men appeared to be about seventeen or eighteen years old. And looked quite out of place in their overalls and work boots.

"Well, if it isn't **Timmy and Dale, The Farmers**. Tell me parders, how does it feel to be off the farm and in the big city among the city slickers for a change."

Dale and Timmy just looked at Don, quite unimpressed.

"You know, good sir," Dale retorted in a British accent. "Just because we're farmers, it doesn't mean we've spent our entire life on the farm and haven't ventured out into the world,"

"Precisely my good man," Timmy added, his arms folded. "Despite out time managing a herd of dairy cattle, we've also managed to take time to visit parts of the world."

"We've enjoyed the fine art on display in the museums of London and Paris."

"Sipped on the finest wines of and ales from Ireland"

"Danced to the melodies of Scottish folk songs."

"And even experienced some of the best Broadway musical's New York City has to offer."

Don's mouth, as well as a majority of the audiences, fell open in awe. For young farmers, they were rather well spoken and had many high-cultured experiences.

"Wow... I mean... that's great," Don spoke again. "It's just that I thought-"

"We were uneducated, dumb farm boys who only know about picking rocks and shoveling manure?" Timmy questioned, sounding offended.

"I dare say, these city slickers," Dale tutted. "Always thinking little of us farmers."

"Rather," Timmy huffed as the two made their way to the streets. "How closed-minded and stereotypical can city slickers be?"

"And do kindly do something about this loose step!" Dale called up to Don as he carefully stepped over the spot so many contestants had tripped over. "One could fall and catch a nasty injury."

Dale and Timmy properly greeted each contestant with a "Salutations" or a "Good day ma'am. Good day sir."

"And that's why this show is so great," Don chuckled. "People constantly surprising us. Anyways, let's keep things moving. Ladies and gentlemen, say hello to **Alicia and Morgan: The Medical Students!** "

The crowd applauded as two younger ladies, dressed in medical attire, came out of Union Station and made their way down to Don.

"So ladies, I'm sure you'll be happy to know that because of so many accident prone contestants we've had here today, your skills as doctors will be put to the test."

Alicia, the smaller of the two, just huffed.

"Please Don, if you think we're going to help the competition win any challenges, you're sadly mistaken. If they injure themselves, it's their responsibility to seek out other medical attention. It's of no concern to us."

"Uh... that's a little cold, isn't it Alicia," whispered Morgan, Alicia's tall and lanky Asian partner. "I mean, what if it's a medical emergency like... I don't know, a broken arm? Or something like that nature?"

Alicia glanced over at her partner, who was beginning to get misty-eyed at the thought of leaving a hurt contestant unattended. Soon, she could see tears forming in Morgan's eyes.

"Oh, for the love of..." Alicia groaned in defeat. "Fine. But ONLY if it's an emergency. Anything less, they're on their own."

"But... what about during rest periods?" Morgan sniffled. "Surely you wouldn't let them remain harmed when we're not competing. We'd go against our oath to medicine if we did, wouldn't we?"

Alicia tried to assure Morgan they wouldn't be doing such a thing, but seeing her watery eyes, how could she?

"Ugh... we'll do what we can to help someone in need," Alicia sighed.

Morgan excitedly squealed and pulled her partner in for a hug. She didn't see it, but Alicia just rolled her eyes at this.

"Glad to hear it," Don chuckled. "Now hurry up and join the others. We've had a bad case of people tripping down these steps today for some reason."

"What?!" Morgan gasped. "Where are they?! Do they need medical attention?! Hold on people! Help is on the way!"

Pulling out her medical bag, Morgan raced down the steps to find those that were injured from the fall.

"Morgan! Wait!" Alicia called after her. "Save your energy! The race is going to start soon!" Alicia raced after her partner quickly. When she finally reached her, she found Morgan already attending to the scratches on Sammy's face.

"Hey! She scratched me first!" Amy snapped. "You should treat my scratches before you do hers!"

"Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't know! I'll-"

Before Morgan could say anything else, Alicia cut her off and got into Amy's face.

"Wait your turn!" she snapped. "She'll aide you when she finishes helping out your sister!"

"Excuse me?!" Amy demanded. "Who do you think you are telling me when I can and can't get medical attention!"

"Oh, I think I'm the one with the other medical bag here... and right now, I see another set of twins that have some cuts and bruises on them. So now that we've cleared this up, you'll just have to wait your turn! Thank you for your patience!"

Alicia didn't wait for Amy to respond. She pulled out her medical bag and made her way over to Mickey and Jay so she could begin treating their wounds.

"I've got a feeling those two are going to come in handy throughout the entity of this race," Don chuckled.

"Then why wouldn't you have medical staff on hand right off the bat?!" came a highly annoying voice.

Don winced as the high-pitched voice rang through his ear. He turned around to see the next team standing there. Two older men in their mid thirties wearing basic t-shirts and jeans. Both had greasy hair and scowls on their faces.

"Well, I see out **Internet Critics Doug and James [6]** are here," Don sighed. "Not sure why we allowed them to compete."

"You're not sure why we're here?!" demanded Doug, the taller, dark-skinned of the two critics. "Well, you know what we're not sure of?! We're not sure how the heck you guys were able to do some of the things you did last season and walk away without dying!"

"Yeah!" added James, the shorter, paler Caucasian of the two barked. "Like how did Sanders survive falling at free falling speeds for seven miles and only end up with a broken arm?! In reality, she'd be dead! It makes no sense!"

Down below, Sanders folded her arms and scowled. She did not like being reminded of her injury from last season that almost cost her team the race.

"Or how did Dwayne only manage to go blind after eating that stew in Morocco?!" Doug added. "If food was really that hot, shouldn't his insides have bled out and put him in the hospital with an ulcer?! Gosh, it's like people don't even do their research anymore!"

On the streets, Dwayne muttered something he had to cover Junior's ears for.

"I know!" James exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "I mean, how difficult is it for people to do research these days! Gosh, they're so lazy! Just like that episode where-"

"And I've heard enough from you two," Don muttered as he pushed James tumbling down the steps to the streets below, smiling at each yelp James made. He then turned to Doug. "I suggest you go down there too if you don't want to meet the same fate."

"Fine! Whatever," Doug snapped. "And speaking of these steps! If everyone's tripping at the same spot, why doesn't everyone else just take another route down?! It's not that hard people! If you go down over **here,** you won't trip and fall! Oh my gosh! It's like someone finally grew a brain around here! I mean-"

Unfortunately for Doug and to the pleasure of everyone else, Doug's theory proved flawed. The very first step he took, he tripped over his own feet and went tumbling to the streets below. Again, Don grinned and chuckled at each yelp he made.

Morgan and Alicia, who were now attending to Brick and Devin, glanced over at the Internet Critics. They were still moaning on the ground as they tried to gather themselves from the crash.

"Do we HAVE to help them too?" Alicia whispered to Morgan.

Morgan put a finger to her chin and thought for a minute. In the end, she told Alicia that they were still patients that needed their help, so they would be breaking their code to say no, much to the disappointment of Alicia.

"But... since they're the newest patients, they'll have to wait their turn," Morgan whispered to Alicia with a chuckle.

"Then why'd you help Amy and Sammy first?!" demanded James, who was still in a great deal of pain.

"Yeah! Shouldn't you have helped Mickey and James first?!" Doug added.

Nearby, the shrilling voices of the Critics had forced the bouncers to cover their ears.

"I'm telling you Devon," Marcus spoke. "If those two are like that and we have to share a bus or whatever with them, we're clobbering them."

Devon smiled, punched his hand with his fist, and replied, " **Oh, my brother, testify".**

Back at the podium, another team had joined Don. The two were in their early twenties and dressed in soccer gear. One was about six foot tall, white, and had brown fluffy hair while the other was about seven feet tall, built well, had darker skin, and had his hair in dreadlocks.

" **Brandon! Micah! The Soccer Players!** Welcome to the Ridonculous Race!"

"Thanks, man," Brandon, the shorter one, said as he shook Don's hand.

"So," Don continued. "As soccer players, you must be feeling pretty confident about your chances. Being athletes and all."

"Pretty good theory there Don," Micah, the tall Brazilian chuckled. "But you know, it's like my dad says. Even though we're physically fit with strength, endurance, and speed, none of that compares to our one secret weapon. The one thing we've got that will give us a distinct advantage over the other contestants."

"Hmm. Interesting," Don replied. "And that weapon is?"

Smiling, Micah pointed a finger to his head.

"Oh, your brain," Don said. "Your smarts and wit then?"

"Nope. Definitely not that. We're dumb as a box of rocks," Micah replied, still smiling.

"Um... excuse me?" Brandon questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"No Don," Micah continued, still point to his head and ignoring his partner. "Our secret weapon is the power of... Positive Thinking!"

"Um... say again?" Don asked.

Brandon rolled his eyes, but smiled just the same.

"It's his life motto," he explained to Don. "His dad is a motivational speaker and all his life, he's been taught the importance of thinking positive and... let's just say he takes it to heart."

"Ayup! My positive heart!" Micah added. "Nothing but positive vibes here! Positive mentality! Positive energy. Heck, even my blood is positive. AB positive to be exact."

Down below, Geoff and Brody exchanged looks.

"I like this guy," Brody said.

" 'Cha! Totally!" Geoff replied, fist-bumping his partner.

"That's encouraging and all," Don said. "But I'm pretty sure your size, strength, speed, and endurance will have a hand in this race."

"Are you positive?" Micah asked with a chuckle. He and Brandon then walked down the steps and joined the others at the starting line, saying hello to those who greeted them.

"I have to say," Don announced. "I'm pleasantly surprised so far. There aren't too many insane newbies."

" ** _Ahem!"_** came a new, yet familiar voice. Don looked over to see a familiar face: a short, plump teenager wearing a gray outfit and sporting purple hair.

"Oh, great. I spoke too soon," Don grumbled. "Max, what the heck are you doing here?"

" _ **Fool!**_ " Max barked. "Have you forgotten that I, Max, the most **_evil_** contestant in the history of Total Drama, have entered the race to become the most _**evil**_ contestant you've ever had on this show as well?!"

"Oh gee, how could that have slipped my mind?" Don replied sarcastically. "And I suppose the million dollar prize is of no interest to you?"

"Well, actually. I kind of need the cash," Max replied, tapping his fingers together somewhat nervously. "My baby-sitting job hasn't been meeting my expenses for taking over the world, so... here I am I guess. Plus, I've always wanted to see other countries."

"Mm-hmm," Don replied, unimpressed. "Well, I'm sure you already know this, but in order to compete, you need a partner."

"I am aware of the stipulations of this contest, you fool!" Max angrily snapped, pointing a finger to Don. "And rest assured. I have a partner for this." Max then turned to the audience and the other contestants.

" _ **Foolish worms!**_ **"** he began in his menacing voice. " _ **Brace yourselves! For the most EVIL team in the history of this contest is making their way down the steps of this feeble train station! Beg for mercy as you stand before the presence of... TEAM EVIL! MAX... and my new sidekick... ZACHARIAH!"**_

At that moment, a lightning bolt impressively struck the top of Union Station.

"Weird weather today," Noah nonchalantly said.

As the smoke cleared from the top of the train station, everyone gasped in horror at the figure that stood atop the steps.

A pasty, lanky, greasy man stood there with no emotion to his face whatsoever. In fact, had he not been silently walking down the steps, one would have figured him to be in a vegetated state of mind with his eyes half closed and mouth half-opened.

At the podium, Don shrieked in terror and hid from sight. Down below, Mickey and Jay embraced one another in terror. Owen grabbed hold of Noah, Emma, Kitty, Rachel, and Amie and held them close in horror. (Rachel would have complained about not consenting to this, but the sight of Zachariah made her so scared, she completely forgot) Joe hid behind Fiona in fear, who was quite taken aback by the sight herself. And thought their expressions didn't show it, Ennui and Crimson too felt afraid.

"..ah..." Ennui spoke, indicating he was yelling in terror.

"...just avoid eye contact and stop showing fear..." Crimson said in her usual monotone voice.

Zachariah, the newcomer, slowly walked down the stairs and approached Max.

"Ah, my new sidekick! Striking fear in the hearts of the world already. I've taught him well, have I not?" Max proudly boasted. "Now, my minion, explain to the world why your terror will help me reign supreme."

But instead of stopping, Zachariah continued walking right past Max to the streets below, his expression not changing in the slightest. As if he were some kind of zombie. (Much to Don's pleasure and relief)

"Uh... minion?" Max called after Zachariah, who continued to ignore Max.

Don, who had come out of hiding, glanced down at Max.

"Uh... ha ha ha... he's still learning the basics of being evil," Max nervously replied. He then ran after Zachariah "Minion!" he called out. "Your master is talking to yo-WOAH!"

As Max ran after Zachariah, he unfortunately became the next victim of those who had taken a tumble down the steps and crashing to the streets.

 **THUD!**

Max landed painfully down below and groaned in pain. But at the same time, Zachariah had reached the streets as well. Again, still staring ahead with the same expression, he grabbed ahold of Max and dragged him to their position in the streets.

"...thank you, minion..." Max muttered while being dragged away.

Nearby, Alicia and Morgan, who were attending to Devin and Dwayne, stared in horror at the sight of Zachariah.

"Morgan... do we HAVE to treat Max's wounds?" Alicia shuddered.

"Um... wounds? I don't know what you're talking about," Morgan replied.

To this, Alicia sighed in relief. She didn't care to try and approach the fiendish-looking Zachariah. That guy was giving off all kinds of bad vibrations.

"Man, and things were going so smoothly too," Don muttered. "They've always got to get a couple wacko's on these shows, don't they?"

Then, without warning, a puff of purple smoke engulfed Don and his podium. Everyone could hear Don coughing and hacking.

"WHA hack .THE cough hack WHAT THE HECK JUST HAPPENED?!"

"Greetings citizen!" came a bold, powerful voice.

As the purple smoke cleared, a young man who appeared to be in his late teens stood before Don at the podium. This young man wore a purple fedora, a purple mask around his eyes with the holes cut out, a purple sport jacket, black pants, and purple wrestling boots.

"Why can't we just get a season where all the contestants are normal?!" Don moaned. "Like, why is it that stupidity draws ratings?"

"Fear not citizens!" the newcomer continued to speak. "For I, Quinton, _**MASTER OF ALL STARS**_ , have arrived. Your fears and worries run from me, for I am as brave as one can be!"

"...ahem..."

A smaller, meeker, voice that sounded like it was going through puberty spoke up interrupting the grand entrance of Quinton. Quinton looked down at his side, where a younger teen about fifteen years old stood. His hair was a curly red and his face was covered with freckles. His mask was green, but he also had to wear his glasses. He wore a white wrestling singlet and a green cape that didn't exactly compliment his overweight body. But despite his appearance, the younger crusader had a great smile on his face, which showed off his many braces.

"Ugh," Quinton groaned. "And this is my assistant Elroy," he lazily introduced his partner.

"Hi!" Elroy greeted the crowd, "I'm Elroy. I'm his sidekick." **[4]**

Down below, chuckles and laughing could be heard among the crowd and the other contestants.

"And I assume your superpowers are going to help you guys win this race, huh?" Don asked, unimpressed.

"Of course not!" Quinton snapped. "We don't live in some fantasy world where people mutate into super heroes! We train in martial arts every day! Run marathons! Work out in gyms... well, at least I do. Elroy here is still trying to find a good routine, but he's a rookie so we'll cut him some slack... but anyways, we're not SUPER heroes. We're EVERY DAY heroes!"

"Really? Because on my cue cards, it says you're **The Superheroes."**

"What?!"

Without waiting for a response, Quinton snatched the cue card from Don's hand and read over it. When he saw it did indeed read "The Superheroes", he glanced over at Elroy with an annoyed expression.

"Elroy!" Quinton whined. "I thought I told you to mark us down as the EVERY DAY heroes!"

"Gee, sorry Quinton," Elroy apologized. "But I mean, you said we were going to wear the costumes and everything. I mean, it would be kind of misleading other wise. Heck, you even told me I was a 'super-hero-in-training'."

Quinton smacked his forehead in frustration. "And this is why you never send the sidekick to do the hero's job," he muttered. "Elroy, just grab me some coffee before the race starts please."

"Yes sir!" Elroy saluted his partner and ran off.

Don just stared mystified by what he was witnessing. After realizing the silence, he spoke.

"So... dare I ask why you two entered the race?"

"It's simple, my good sir!" Quinton spoke, returning to his superhero like tone. "Because the world is in desperate need of a TRUE hero! And I, Quinton, _**MASTER OF ALL STARS**_ , am that hero who will bring the world out of the darkness and into the light!"

Then, without warning, Quinton began to pull pictures of himself and other merchandise out of his backpack and giving them to Don. Such merchandise included a hat, a t-shirt, and a coffee cup all with Quinton's face on them.

"Now that's Q-U-I-N-T-O-N," he continued. "Autographs are usually ten dollars per picture and half off with the purchase of other merchandise. Here's my business card and my number. Call it if you ever want to hold a press release to advertise this show in the future."

"Gee... thanks," Don grumbled as he was covered in Quinton merchandise.

"Now, STAND BACK EVIL DOERS!" he boldly cried out. "FOR QUINTON, _**MASTER OF ALL STARS,**_ IS HERE TO SAVE THE - _ **WAUGH!"**_

Quinton's heroic entrance was ruined as he tripped and tumbled down to the streets of Toronto. Each time he hit a step, the audience, the contestants, and even Don winced as Quinton let out a yelp each time. Finally, he came to a rest at the bottom of the steps, moaning in pain.

"Is it wrong to say I don't feel too bad for him?" MacArthur whispered to Sanders.

"Probably... but I won't mind this time." Sanders replied.

Elroy had returned to the podium with Quinton's coffee, only to find his partner and mentor missing in action.

"Quinton?!" he called out. "Where'd he go? I've got his latte."

Don pointed down to the bottom of the steps where Quinton lay motionless, being attended to by Morgan and Alicia.

"Huh... someone else tripped, huh?" Elroy asked.

"Been having a problem with that today for some reason," Don replied.

Elroy gave Don the latte and observed the steps carefully.

"Ah, here's the problem," he said after a minute of studying the steps. "Right here. This step's loose. Surprised no one did anything about it earlier."

Without waiting for a response, Quinton pulled come quick cement out of his backpack and went to work fixing the step. A minute later, the step was glued back in place. Elroy then pulled a "CAUTION – WET CEMENT" sigh out of his backpack and placed it by the step.

"Um... how much stuff do you have in your backpack?" Don asked, somewhat impressed.

"Super hero rule number 64 – Always be prepared." Elroy answered.

"I guess... and just in time for our last team too They... they... wow...!" Don's voice trailed off as he looked up the stairs.

Indeed the last team made their way out of Union Station and stated coming down the steps. The sight of these two blonde ladies managed to catch the eye of every man (and even some women) in attendance that day. They were both in their early twenties and both were incredibly fit and beautiful. Calleigh, the blonde with a red shirt and black jeans, wore her hair down whereas Sabrina wore a light blue tank top, blue jeans, and had her long hair in pigtails.

"Hey loves!" Sabrina called out to the crowd while blowing a kiss. "We may be last, but certainly not least, right babe?"

Calleigh, the more serious of the two, just rolled her eyes, but chuckled at the same time. "Of course not Sabrina... and don't call me babe."

"Oh, right. Sorry babe... I mean Calleigh."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I give you **Sabrina and Calleigh, The Cosplay Models!" [7]**

Down below, the crowd roared in approval as the ladies waved to them. Among the contestants, many of the men, even those with girlfriends, found themselves fixated on the two. Carrie nudged Devin to snap him out of it. Stephanie had to smack Ryan. Emma cleared her throat, which caused Noah to return to his senses. Even Jason found himself staring, much to Jamie's annoyance.

"...wow..." Ennui spoke despite showing no emotion.

"...stop drooling..." Crimson replied, also in her regular monotone.

"HUBBA HUBBA!" Greg cried out. "HEY! WHICH OF YOU TWO WANTS TO SPEND AN EVENING WITH GREG, HUH?! I'LL ROCK YOUR WORLD!"

"Tch. Typical of men," Rachel muttered. "They see two blondes with big boobs and their hormones take over."

Back at the podium, Elory was blushing feverishly as the sight of the two girls. Then, remembering his status as a super hero in training, he sprang into action.

"Careful, ladies," he politely spoke. "There's some wet cement here. If you'd like, I can escort you safely down the steps to the streets of Toronto."

Sabrina giggled at the sight of the younger teenager.

"Aww, such a gentleman," she teased and allowed him her hand.

At first, Calleigh refused. But after some pestering from Sabrina, she gave in and allowed Elroy to escort her down as well. With a beautiful girl in each arm, Elroy became the envy of everyone in Toronto.

At the bottom of the steps, Morgan and Alicia were attending to Quinton's wounds, ignoring the moaning and complaining from Doug and James when they had skipped them. (Apparently, they didn't take too kindly to their criticisms of their yin and yang friendship being too stereotypical) When Quinton came to, his eyes widened when he saw Elroy coming down the steps with two gorgeous blonde models.

"There you are ladies," Elroy said as he let go of their arms.

"Aww, thanks love," Sabrina cooed. Then, to repay the super hero in training, she bent down and gave Elroy a small kiss on the cheek, which caused Quinton's jaw to drop in shock.

"Think nothing of it ma'am," Elroy called after her. "After, Super hero rule #81 states: a good deed a day keeps negative vibes away."

Sabrina just giggled as Calleigh dragged her partner to the starting line. Elroy then proudly strutted away.

"But-But-But-But-But-But-But-But-" Quinton stammered.

"Save it, bud," Alicia chuckled. "I'm sure there'll be plenty of other opportunities for you to impress your adoring fans."

Quinton growled in frustration as he brushed himself off and walked over to his partner at the starting line. 'Should have been me getting those smooches on the cheek,' he grumbled. 'I'M the hero! HE'S the sidekick!'.

Back at the podium, Don looked over the thirty-six teams that were assembled at the starting line. Though he maintained his professionalism, he was very excited for this years contest deep down inside.

"One more time ladies and gentlemen! Let's hear it for all of our teams!"

The people of Toronto cheered and applauded all thirty-six teams, who waved at the crowd excitedly.

"This is SO cool!" Kitty exclaimed as she wrapped one arm around Emma and pulled her in close for a quick selfie, making sure to get the hundreds of adoring fans in the background.

Next to them, Jamie and Jason smiled and waved back to the crowd while holding hands.

"Did you ever think we'd get to go an adventure like this sweeite?" Jamie whispered to her lover.

"No... and I wouldn't dream of doing it with anyone else, either," Jason answered.

And though Jamie didn't see it, Jason's hand returned to his side pocket, where he began to fiddle with something yet again.

Elsewhere, Max laughed maniacally as the crowd applauded.

"That's right, fools!" Max cried out. "Cheer for your inevitable doom! For upon completing this race, I will have successfully... _**TAKEN OVER THE WORLD!"**_

As Max laughed, his partner Zachariah continued to stare off into nothing with the same blank expression he had had all day.

By this time, Don had made his way down Union Station's steps and stood next to the starting line.

"Now I know everyone can't wait to get this show on the road... but before we get things under way, I do believe that there is one more thing that must be done."

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a remote control. After showing it off to everyone, he pushed the button on it. After a very light tremble, a hole in the street opened up. Out of that hole came a familiar sight: a small box shaped like the host. To this, everyone cheered and clapped their hands excitedly.

"There we go! And with that, all the Don boxes around the world have been activated! We are ready to get this race underway!"

"Hey! How did a small button like that activate all the Don boxes around the world?!" demanded James, pointing an accusing finger at Don. "That doesn't make any sense!"

"And how did you manage to get the Don boxes in place without having people on the other sights to make sure no one was there to tamper with them?!" Doug added. "That doesn't make any sense! This whole show has way too many things that don't make sense!"

Nearby, Ellody whispered to Mary. "I think the real question here is, who cares?"

To this Mary nodded in agreement.

Don had ignored the Internet Critic's complaints and was getting ready for the race to start. "Everyone knows the rules. When I say go, everyone run to the first Don box right over there to get your first travel tip. From there, your journey around the world begins."

"See? I told you this would be a great idea," Fiona whispered to Joe. "How many opportunities do you really get to see the world like this?"

When no answer came, Fiona glanced over at her partner. To her dismay, he was far too busy playing on the Nintendo Switch he had brought with him. Fiona nudged for her partner to pay attention and forced Joe to put the Switch away.

"As always," Don continued, "be quick. And be resourceful. Because unlike last year, due to the number of teams being doubled, every single jaunt of the race will result in an elimination. So if you're the last team to arrive, you WILL be eliminated from the race."

Sanders and MacArthur cricked their knuckles as they heard this. Nearby, Josse and Jacques glared at the cadets.

"Zis time, it will end differently," Jacques assured Josse. "It will be all ze other teams that finish behind uz."

'That they will, Jacques," Josse evilly chuckled. "that they will."

"However, the team that crosses the finish line at the end of this race will walk away with a grand total of... **TEN MILLION DOLLARS!"**

"Oh my gosh babe," Sabrina whispered to Calleigh. "Just think. If we win that money, we don't have to be models anymore. We can finally be full time cosplayers!"

"Speak for yourself," Calleigh retorted. "And don't call me babe!"

"Heck, with that kind of money, we don't have to worry about sponsors," Pete chuckled.

"You might have to if your old spending habits kick in, hence the reason you need sponsors in the first place," Gerry laughed.

"Race hard. Stay safe. Give it your all. Best of luck to you all. And of course... have fun!" Don concluded.

"Fun my ass," Greg muttered. "I came to win this thing! You know how much porn and beer I can buy with five million dollars?!"

Again, Aaron just smacked his forehead, which was now leaving a red imprint of his hand.

"We've got this this time, right Laurie?" Miles excitedly asked her vegan teammate.

But Laurie gave no response. She just stared ahead gloomily.

"And with that...Racers... TAKE YOUR POSITIONS!"

The audience went wild as all teams lined up at the starting line.

"Good luck you guys!" Owen called over to Leshawna and Tyler.

"You too sweetie!" Leshawna replied.

"May the best team win," Tyler called back.

"Don't worry, pencil-neck geek. We plan to," Marcus interrupted, cricking his neck.

" _ **Oh, my brother, TESTIFY!"**_ Devon cried out as he cracked his own neck, causing Noah and Leshawna to slightly gag.

"Racers... **On your marks!** "

Devin and Carrie gave each other one last kiss for good luck before the race officially began.

"Good lu- I mean, **good luck, Carrie,"** Junior called over, trying to act cool.

"Aw, you too," Carrie replied.

Junior blushed slightly, but Carrie didn't see this.

" **...Get set..."**

Elroy took the runner's position, whereas Quinton posed heroically for the crowd.

Jen and Tom made the final adjustments to their clothing before taking runner position.

Cindy and Anna finished their twenty stretching routines and prepared themselves for the sprint of their lives.

Geoff and Brody high fived each other to pump up their adrenaline. Then prepared for the sprint.

In the audience, no one was making a sound. The entire crowd was anxiously awaiting the start of the race, completely sucked into the moment.

It was the calm before the storm. The final moments before the epic showdown that would take these thirty-six teams on an ultimate adventure around the world.

"Slowly building up a race with a quiet atmosphere?" Really?!" Doug complained

"That's a bit cliché," James added.

Brandon and Micah ignored the whiny critics and focused on the race ahead.

Then, after what seemed like an eternity...

…..

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

….

"... **RACE!"**

Don had given the signal and all thirty-six teams were off! The **ULTIMATE RIDONCULOUS RACE** was officially under way!

 **A/N – And there we go! The Second Ridonculous Race has officially begun. I hope you guys liked it. On a smaller note, I realize the task I have given myself here. Fortunately, I like a challenge and this sure as heck looks like one. Stand back y'all... THIS... IS WAR!**

Also, I will try to focus on each team as much as possible. However, because there are so many, some may not get a whole lot of attention in certain challenges as far as character development goes in every single chapter. But throughout the story, I think you'll come to love each character as individuals competing in a race as opposed to a race with competitors in it.

 **Leave a review and let me know what you liked and who you think is going to be the first team eliminated. Until next time, peace!**

FOOTNOTES

 **1 – This is a reference to "A Codette World Tour", another story of mine. Like I said, it takes place in the same universe so if you haven't read that yet, go do so!**

 **2 – Leonard's Spell is inspired by the spells Zummi Gummi uses in Adventures of the Gummi Bears. You just add an "um" in there somewhere... Likum Thisum!**

 **3 – This is actually a plot of an original story I'm still cooking up. I'll let you know more details when the time comes.**

 **4– Fiona is owned by Mother-of-trolls on Deviant Art.**

5 – Donald here is inspired by Donald Trump. Or rather his reality television persona. Not his current status as president. I don't get involved in that political bullshit.

 **6- Doug and James are named after The Nostalgia Critic and The Angry Video Game Nerd. That is the only similarity between the two. Their personality comes from people who spend way too much time online complaining about irrelevant shit to the point they become annoying.**

 **7- Calleigh is owned by MustacheSkulls on Deviantart. Go check out their work.**

 **Quick Cheat List of All the Teams:**

 **VETERANS**

 **Devin/Carrie – The Best Friends  
Mickey/Jay – Adversity Twins  
Taylor/Kelly – Mother/Daughter  
Crimson/Ennui – Goths  
Owen/Noah – Reality Pros  
Kitty/Emma – Sisters  
Stephanie/Ryan – The Daters/Haters  
Josse/Jacques – Ice Dancers  
MacArthur/Sanders – Cadets  
Geoff/Brody – Surfer Dudes  
Lorenza/Chet – Step-Brothers  
Rock/Spud – Rockers  
Dwayne/Junior – Father/Son**

 **Tom/Jen – Fashion Bloggers  
Miles/Laurie – Vegans  
Mary/Ellody – Geniuses**

 **Leonard/Tammy – Larpers  
Gerry/Pete – Tennis Rivals**

NEWBIES

Jamie and Jason – Survivalists

 **Joe and Fiona – Opposites**

 **Sabrina and Calleigh – Cosplayers**

 **Aaron and Greg – Roommates**

 **Brandon and Micah – The soccer stars**

 **Rachel and Amie – The SJWs (I know I said Activists, but no, they're SJWs)**

 **Leshawna/Tyler – Reality Rivals**

 **DJ/Ry-Ry – Big Brother Participants**

 **Timmy/Dale – Farmers**

 **Cindy/Anna – Tough Grannies**

 **Amy/Sammy – Twin Sisters**

 **Quinton/Elroy – The "Superheroes"**

 **Marcus/Devon – The Bouncers**

 **Lauren/Donald – The Business Tycoons**

 **Max/Zachariah – Team Evil**

 **Brick/Emily – The Cadets**

 **Alicia/Morgan – The Medical Students**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N – So here we go! The Ultimate Ridonculous Race is under way! As mentioned earlier, I'm going to try to give people enough time to develop or do something in each chapter, but with 72 characters to write for, some are going to get less than others at times. That said, this chapter will give you a better insight into the new teams (Or I hope) so there may not be a lot of action this chapter. But again, I want this story to be about characters competing in a race and not about a race with people in it.**

 **As always, feedback is greatly appreciated. Enough of that, let's keep this bad boy going!**

 **CHAPTER TWO  
Jaunt 1 – Part 1 – Toronto, Ontario Canada.**

The race was on! All thirty-six teams raced toward the Don Box as fast as their legs could carry them.

Owen and Noah were the first to reach the Don Box. The larger teammate smacked the button and the travel tip spat out of the boxes mouth. Noah grabbed it and read it aloud.

"Teams must travel in pairs via taxi to **Woodbine Beach** ," he read. "Each cab must consist of one rookie team and one veteran team. You will find the next Don Box somewhere on the beach."

"All right! We get to go to the beach!" Owen cheered. "Do you think there will be an ice cream cart there?"

"For our sake, let's hope not," Noah dryly replied. "Now come on! Let's find a new team and grab a cab!"

One by one, the teams grabbed their tips from the Don Box. After reading it, they sprinted over toward eighteen cabs that were lined up along the streets, scrambling to find another team to travel with.

During the commotion, Mickey and Jay were being pushed mercilessly around by all the other teams. Each twin tried desperately to call out for another team, but their voices were drowned out among the shouting from everyone else.

"Hey! OW! Watch it! Do you guys need-HEY! OUCH!" Jay cried out.

Mickey wasn't doing much better. Like his brother, he too was being pushed and shoved by the others.

"Jay! I need help!" he panicked as he fell to the ground.

But his brother couldn't help him as he too was being pushed onto the ground.

The two tried to crawl out of the commotion to avoid being crushed. But everywhere they went, there were feet scrambling around, almost crushing the small twins.

Just then, both Jay and Mickey felt themselves being effortlessly lifted from the ground. When they opened their eyes, they saw that Devon, one half of the bouncers, had rescued them and was now holding each one like a sack of potatoes under each arm.

"Good job Devon!" Marcus cried out as he ran up to his partner. "Now get to the cab!"

" **Oh, my brother! TESTIFY!" [1]** Devon shouted as he followed Marcus to a cab, still carrying Mickey and Jay under his arms.

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – Marcus and Devon; The Bouncers  
**_

 **Marcus –** _(His arms are folded)_ I'm Marcus. And this here's Devon, my brother from another mother. We're hired security guards for various clients throughout both the United States and Canada. Politicians, celebrities, night clubs, you name it, we protect it!

 **Devon –** _(Giving a thumbs up)_ **Oh, my brother, TESTIFY!**

 **Marcus –** When me and Devon win this race... and we **will** win... we're gonna donate a large chunk of the cash to anti-bullying programs out there to put an end to bullying once and for all. (He chuckles) Course, the only thing these programs need is me and Devon around to break the neck of any pencil-necked geek who even thinks about bullying someone weaker than they are!

 **Devon –** _(Chuckling)_ **Oh, my brother. TESTIFY!**

 ** _END_**

* * *

One by one, cabs filled with teams were shifting into gear and driving away toward Woodbine Beach. Among the teams that were left, Tammy and Leonard's attempts to team up with another team weren't going so well.

"Amy! Sammy!" Leonard called over to the twin sisters. "What say ye to an alliance between three former residents of the Pahkitew kingdom? Together, we shall venture forth to victory along the shores of the great Lake of Ontario!"

Sammy gave Leonard an awkward glance when she saw him strike a pose with his staff and his partner Tammy throwing confetti into the air. She wasn't thrilled about the idea, but she decided that they needed to get moving if they were going to have any chance of getting to the beach before other teams.

"I guess that could work. Sure. Let's-"

"No way!" Amy suddenly barked. "We are NOT teaming up with a couple of geeks like them! Come on! Let's find another team! One where we actually stand a chance to win with."

"Hey!" Tammy and Leonard snapped. Clearly, they were offended by Amy's words.

"Chill out," Sammy retorted, irritated by her sister's rudeness. "It's not like we're forming an alliance. We're just sharing a cab until we get to the beach."

"I know that," barked Amy. "That's why we need to find another team. They were booted off first last season and I don't want their bad luck rubbing off on me. We are NOT riding with these two losers!"

"Excuse you!" Leonard retorted. "We are not cursed by some enchantment of misfortune! We simply made a critical error in our judgment last time! This time, we shall be victorious!"

"Oh shut it nerds!" Amy snapped, pointing a finger at Leonard. "You and your partner ARE critical errors. Just like Sammy!"

Tammy opened her mouth to retort, but for some reason, the words wouldn't come. Clenching her teeth and glaring at Amy, tears began to form in her eyes. Her words clearly hurt.

"Hey! You take that back!" Sammy cried out. "There's no need to be that mean!"

"Who's being mean? I'm just telling the truth! Look at them! Their record speaks for themselves. Leonard here was the second to get the boot because he refuses to leave his fantasy world. Same thing happened last year, only he got to do it with his short, fat friend here who's just as delusional as he is. Seriously, they're pathetic! And I'm not spending one second of this race near these two losers!"

Still clenching her teeth, Tammy's head hung down and she just stared at the ground. She wanted to say something to Amy. Anything to make her feel how she was feeling. But something inside her wouldn't let her speak. Whether it was her conscious preventing her from doing this or not wanting to start drama this early in the competition, she just continued to hang her head in silence, angry and hurt.

"I mean, it's bad enough I have to do this race with someone as lame as you," Amy continued. "You think I'd want to-"

She never got to finish that sentence. Sammy shoved her in frustration, which knocked her to the ground.

Amy responded by reaching up and pulling her sister's hair. The two continued pulling and clawing at one another, trying to get the upper hand on the other.

Leonard just huffed as he turned his back to the twin sisters.

"Come Tammy," he boasted with his arms folded and eyes closed. "Let us take our skills elsewhere to someone who deserves our talents. What say ye?"

When Leonard didn't hear a response, he opened one eye.

"Tammy?"

There before him stood his teammate, still glaring and scowling at the ground. When he saw the tears in her eyes, he became worried.

"Um... Tammy? Are you okay?"

Again, no response from Tammy.

Nearby, Jamie and Jason had just received their travel tip. As Jason read the clue, Jamie heard the commotion nearby and glanced over where the noise was coming from. She had seen and heard everything Amy had said to the LARPers and took notice of Tammy afterward. Seeing what Amy's words had done to Tammy made her feel sorry for her. She truly believed no one deserved to be treated like that.

"Jamie? Did you hear me?"

Jamie snapped from her thoughts and turned to her boyfriend.

"I said we need to travel with a veteran team to Woodbine Beach. We need to hurry. There aren't many teams left and we don't want to be last to leave."

"Of course," Jamie agreed. She put her finger to her chin in thought. "A veteran team, huh? ….Jason, you go get a cab. I'll bring the other team."

Jason nodded and raced for a cab.

Jamie walked a fast pace over to where Leonard and a hurt Tammy stood. Though she wasn't quite sure of what to make of the two oddly dressed teens, she put those thoughts aside for now. There were more important matter to address at the time. And to her, it wasn't just about the race.

"Hey guys," Jamie greeted the LARPers. "We still haven't found a team. Do you want to come with us?"

Tammy slowly turned toward Jamie, her head still glaring at the ground. Wiping away a tear, she huffed something Jamie couldn't quite understand.

"I'm sorry?" Jamie asked.

"I think she said sure," Leonard explained. Though he wasn't quite sure himself.

"Well... okay then. We should hurry. We don't want to be last to leave."

Leonard and Tammy followed Jamie to a cab, Tammy hanging her head the entire time. Jason climbed in afterward and their cab was off.

The sound of the screeching tires caused Amy and Sammy to stop fighting and look up. They saw the cab containing the Outdoor Survivalists and the LARPers pulling away. They glanced at their surroundings and saw no other teams nearby.

"Oh great job Amy!" Sammy snapped. "Now we're in last place! We should have just gone with them! Why do you have to be like that?!"

"Why can't you just do what I say?" Amy retorted angrily. "We wouldn't even be in this mess if you would just do as I say!"

"Oh, shut up! I don't want to hear it. Let's just find the other team that's still here and go. I don't want to be eliminated first."

"If we do, it'll be your fault," Amy mumbled under her breath. Thankfully Sammy didn't hear this or she would have tackled her again.

"Now then... which other team is left?"

The last cab pulled up to the twins. Sammy opened the back door and already sitting in the backseat were Lorenzo and Chet. When the step-brothers saw the cheerleaders, they gave the sisters their best smiles. (Which were more cheesy than suave).

Amy and Sammy groaned. Though they didn't want to, they had no choice. They regrettably climbed into the cab and they drove off to catch up with the rest of the teams.

'Ugh... forced to team with my sister and we have to ride with these two dweebs,' Amy grumbled to herself. 'I'll bet anything that none of the other teams are having a worse day than I am right now.

* * *

 _ **(CAB 4 – Police Officers /Superheroes)**_

"And allow me to add that as an every day hero, I Quinton, _**Master of the Stars,**_ fully understand and appreciate the selfless sacrifice our ladies and gentlemen of law enforcement have to make on a daily basis. To show my appreciation to you two brave women of the law, here are some free coffee cups and baseball hats."

Without waiting for a reply, Quinton had reached into his backpack and pulled said two coffee mugs and baseball hats. All said items had Quinton's face on them. Before Sanders and McArthur could say anything, Quinton had placed the caps on their heads and a mug in their hands.

Sanders struggled to find the right words to say to the overly enthusiastic caped teenager. Though she appreciated the gesture, the merchandise with his face on it made her feel somewhat uncomfortable.

"Uh, this is really nice of you and all, but-"

"Oh! Of course!" Quinton interrupted Sanders smacking his forehead. "How could I be so insensitive! You want to know how you can get more, right? Well, lucky for you two, as members of the police force, you are eligible for a ten percent discount on all purchases made on my online store! Here's a card with the website."

Without waiting for a response, he placed a business card into Sander's hand.

"Also, there's a gallery on there with pictures that I've taken with my fans. Speaking of which, how about a picture?"

Again, before either of the cadets could answer, Quinton was making Elroy fetch his camera out of his backpack. With a salute, Elroy grabbed his classic Polaroid instant photo and took a picture of Quinton posing with the cadets. The flash temporarily blinded the cadets causing MacArthur to curse as she rubbed her eyes.

"Hmm... the photo looks good," Quinton said as the picture came into view. "Except... oh, darn! MacArthur. You blinked. We can't have that, can we? Elroy! Another picture! Chop! Chop!"

With another salute, Elroy raised the camera again. But before he could take the picture, MacArthur reached over and slapped the camera out of the shorter, chunkier teen's hands.

"Take that picture again and I will make you eat that camera! Do you understand me?!" she growled.

Shuddering, Elroy slowly lowered the camera, not daring to see if MacArthur would follow through with her threat.

Sanders rubber her forehead, wondering if any other teams were having as much trouble with their cab mates.

* * *

 _ **(CAB 2 – Sisters/Internet Critics)**_

"And why was it that the elevator only stopped once while Tom and Jen were in it?!" Doug complained. "I mean, Dwayne had hit every single button in there! It should have stopped on every single floor!"

Emma and Kitty massaged the temples on their foreheads. For ten minutes now, Doug and James had been whining and pointing out all the mistakes during the first challenge of last year's Ridonculous Race.

"Did you ever consider that maybe the producers edited that part out so that it didn't take up pointless time?" Kitty grumbled, hoping her point would silence the Internet Critics.

"If that were the case, then why didn't Tom and Jen remove those buckets from their heads until the last floor?!" James demanded to know. "That means the elevator only stopped once!"

"And how did the Daters and the Reality Pros end up on the first flight when they finished the zip line challenge tenth and eleventh?!" Doug cried out. "Did the producers let them go ahead of everyone else?!"

"I think the real question on everyone's mind right now is 'Who cares?'" Emma retorted, still massaging her temples.

"I DO!" James and Doug cried out at the same time.

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – Emma and Kitty; The Sisters**_

 **Kitty –** _(Glaring at Emma) '_ Let's just pair up with the first new team we see,' you said. 'It won't matter,' you said. 'It'll be painless,' you said.

 **Emma –** _(Throwing her hands in the air in frustration)_ All right! I was wrong! Just drop it already! I've had enough of listening to people complaining today!

 _ **END**_

* * *

 _ **(CAB 9 – Ice Dancers/Team EVIL)**_

"Come on driver! Faster!" Josse barked. "We will NOT lose this first round of the race!"

"Yes pleezee!" Jacques added. "I do not wish to zpend another zecond in dis cab with... **GAH**!"

As Jacques had been yelling at the driver, he wasn't paying attention to his surroundings. He had unintentionally backed into Zachariah. Seeing the pale, emotionless face of the tall lanky man inches from his face caused him to yelp in fear.

Jacques jumped into his teammates arms quivering as Zachariah continued to stare blankly at him, not blinking once.

"It'z az if he'z trying to steal my zoul," Jacques whispered to Josse.

Normally, Josse would have told Jacques to stop acting like a baby and toughen up. But upon looking at Zachariah, she began to feel quite uneasy herself.

* * *

 _ **MAP ROOM CONFESSIONAL – (Max and Zachariah – Team EVIL)**_

 **Max –** Ever since my escapades of Pahkitew Island, I have been desperately searching for a new minion to assist in my ploys for world domination. After that traitor Scarlett tried to exterminate me for her own selfish gain, I had to get back on my feet! So I signed up for the Ridonculous Race!

 _(Max stops speaking in an evil tone and switches to a more casual tone)_ The only problem besides finding someone to water my mother's garden and cover all my baby-sitting jobs was that I needed a partner.

 _(Max begins speaking in his evil tone again)_ Therefore, I submitted an ad through the most _**evil**_ of methods... Craigslist! **[2]** And voila! Within a mere twenty-four hours, I had found my partner! Meet Zachariah!

 _(Zachariah continues to stare blankly at the camera with his mouth open as he has been doing all along)_

Together, the two of us shall win this competition and finally... **FINALLY TAKE OVER THE WORLD!** _**BWA HA HA HA HAAAA!**_

 _(Max switched to his normal tone)_ Also with the prize money I'll finally be able to afford more advertising for my baby-sitting services and buy some new toys for the babies to play with.

 _(Max clears his throat and switches to his evil tone)_ And what will you do with your share of the prize money, minion?

 _(Zachariah slowly faces Max, and stares at him as he had been to the camera. Then, without speaking, he slowly turns back to the camera)_

…..Um... ahem... sorry, he doesn't speak much.

 _ **END**_

* * *

"Ah, excellent," Max chuckled as he rubbed his hands together. "Now that my minion has effortlessly ceased your annoying ramblings, allow me to speak."

Max cleared his throat before putting on his most fierce evil expression. (which was still quite pathetic)  
"I'm sure you two are quite proud of your antics last year, thus earning the title of the season's villains and such. But this year, that shall not be the case! For your evil will pale in comparison to mine! And not only shall Zachariah and I succeed in earning our victory in this contest. We shall also steal the title of the most _**evil**_ team to ever compete on The Ridonculous Race... **EVER!** "

Max broke out into his evil laughter, which was still in much need of improvement.

Josse, who was still holding Jacques in her arms, gave her partner a confused look. Jacques appeared as confused as Josse was with this new team. They wanted to tell Max what a joke they thought he and his partner were. But Zachariah's presence in the cab made them think twice about. Especially the way he continued to just stare blankly at the ice dancers, his mouth staying half open all the time.

Zachariah only broke his gaze when a fly began circling around him. Without moving his head, the pale skinned man's gray colored eyes began following the movement of the fly. Then, with the reflexes of a crocodile, Zachariah lunged his head toward the fly and trapped the creature in his mouth. After slowly chewing, he swallowed the fly with a loud gulp. He then returned his gaze to the horrified ice dancers. After licking his lips, he continued to stare at them as though nothing had happened.

All the while, Max had been laughing and looking at the ice dancers the whole time. He had no idea what had just happened. All he saw was the ice dancers quivering in fear.

"I can tell by your trembling that you're terrified of your chances in this race," Max proudly boasted.

* * *

 _ **CAB 6 – Roommates/Fashion Bloggers)**_

In the sixth cab, Tom and Jen were checking on their blogs via the smart phones they had brought with them for the race.

"Psst... hey. You. Tall and lanky."

Tom felt a nudge in his side. He looked up to see that the taller, built, blonde of the roommates was the one trying to get his attention.

"My name is Tom," Tom said, somewhat annoyed by his description of him. "What can I do for you...uh..."

"Greg. The name's Greg."

"Right. Greg. So what do you want?"

"I was just wondering. You and Jen here. You two... um... the two of you..."

"No, we are not a couple," Jen replied. "We're just friends. Best friends to be exact."

"Ah... not quite what I was going to ask, but that does sort of answer my question I guess."

Tom raised an eyebrow when he heard this. "What exactly were you going to ask me then?"

"Well, I was gonna ask if you and Jen were banging each other. Then-"

" **Excuse me?!"** The fashion bloggers cried in disgusted unison.

"What? It's a legit question!" Greg replied, his hands raised in defense. "I mean, you two are always seen together and with an ass and a pair of legs like hers, I would figure you'd be banging that like a drum set. Like that drummer from Fog Hat or something. Getting all in that man!"

By now, Jen was glaring the most fiery death glare she could at the blonde-haired roommate.

"I'm going to take an educated guess here. You're not very popular at social gatherings, are you?." Tom asked.

"Meh, I dunno how I'd do at those to be honest," Greg answered, oblivious to how irritated and angry he had made the bloggers. "I spend a lot of my time alone in my apartment looking up Instagram models. You see some of the knockers on those babes? Heck! Jen! You'd be an amazing Instagram model with that bod of yours. I guarantee you'd get a lot more traffic toward your blog if you opened one of those. Show a little more leg here, a little bit of your breasts there, then-"

 _ **(Five Minutes later)**_

The cab carrying The Roommates and The Fashion Bloggers was the first one to arrive at Woodbine Beach. As the cab rolled to a halt, Jen and Tom were the first to furiously exit the vehicle and stomp away. Seconds later, Greg emerged from the cab, rubbing his cheek where a red hand print was clearly visible.

"Dunno what her problem is," Greg muttered as he continued to rub his cheek. "You hear women say all the time they want men to compliment them. Then when they do, they get all pissy."

"You were talking about her posing nude on the internet," Aaron responded as he exited the cab behind Greg.

"Yeah! That's a compliment! It means men want to see her body! She's got a gift from God that she needs to shared with the world!"

* * *

 _ **MAP ROOM CONFESSIONAL – (Greg and Aaron – The Roommates)**_

 **Greg –** Hey, the name's Greg. How ya doin'? This here is my roommate Aaron. Sure, he's kind of a dork and probably one of the biggest beta males you'll ever come across in your life. But when you look past his scrawny five foot two body and those thick glasses, he's a pretty cool guy.

 **Aaron –** (He doesn't look too impressed of Greg's description of him) Gee, I'm flattered. Thank you for those kind words.

 **Greg –** No problem. But seriously, we're the ultimate combination of brains and brawn here! With my muscle and his smarts, no other team stands a chance! …. and with these guns, none of the ladies stand a chance! Am I right Aaron?

 **Aaron –** (He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes as he starts to rub his temples) Why didn't I just go to that gaming tournament with Austin and James instead? It would have been a lot less painful.

 **Greg –** And boring and a lot less hot babes!

 ** _END_**

* * *

Tom and Jen glanced around the beach of Lake Ontario.

"I... I think we're the first teams here!" Jen cried out excitedly.

"Yes! I guess it was worth the thirty minute ride of torture from that guy," Tom chuckled. "But now's not the time to celebrate or gloat! We've got to find that Don Box and quick!"

The Fashion Bloggers and The Roommates raced for the beach as fast as they could. Sure enough, the Don Box was located right in the middle of the beach. Greg was the first to hit the button and the box spat out the travel tip. He grabbed it and read it out loud.

"It's an Either/Or. It says: **Scan or Spike.** "

* * *

 ** _(HOST DON)_**

The camera cut to Don walking along the shores of Woodbine Beach.

"Woodbine Beach, the largest of the four beaches located in Toronto. A very popular tourist attraction for any holiday in Canada as well as enthusiastic volleyball players. Lots... and lots... and LOTS of volleyball players. With over 90 courts, it is one of the most popular volleyball attractions throughout North America. **[3]**

In this jaunt of the race, teams have the choice of scanning the 8.2 Kilometer beach with a metal detector for their next clue or taking on a professionally trained volleyball team in which the first team to three points in a volleyball game wins.

Did I mention the number of volleyball enthusiasts that come here? Because there are a LOT of them."

As Don finished explaining the challenge, a volleyball flew over and smacked Don in the back of the head, knocking the host off his feet and into the sand.

"Sorry dude!" called over an off screen volleyball player.

 ** _(END)_**

* * *

"Ugh... which one do we choose?" Tom asked.

"Well, we don't stand a chance against the volleyball pros. But the sand could ruin my clothes! And these are NOT machine washable!"

"Ugh! Quite the conundrum we're in," Tom agreed.

"But wouldn't you two have to get your clothes dirty either way?" Aaron asked. "I mean, beach volleyball really isn't any cleaner. My guess is you'll have to dive around to keep the ball from hitting the ground."

Tom and Jen both cried out in horror again. The idea of their clothes being ruined was too much for them to imagine.

"Or you could take the clothes off," Greg suggested. "I know the viewing world wouldn't mind seeing you in your underwear Jen. I know I wouldn't-"

 ** _SMACK!_**

Greg rubbed the other side of his cheek where Jen had once again smacked him.

Aaron just sighed and turned his attention to Tom. "You'll have to excuse him. He doesn't mean any harm or offense. He's just... how do I put this? ….stupid. He's stupid."

"That's putting it mildly," Tom huffed.

Then, as Tom was reflecting on Greg's crude statement, his eyes lit up. "That's it!" he exclaimed. "Jen! Greg's actually got an idea there!"

"What?!" Jen exclaimed.

"Huh?!" Aaron gasped.

"I do?!" Greg asked.

"Well, sort of. Not the underwear part. But taking out clothes off! We can still do this challenge and not dirty our current clothes!"

"How? We don't have any other clothes with us Tom!"

"Don't you remember Jen?! We passed by that exquisite swimsuit shop that we blogged about not too long ago! It's only one kilometers back in the town! I'm sure the owners would be willing to help us out! We can show off some of their great swimsuits while we do this challenge and we can keep our clothes clean! It's fool proof!"

Jen rubbed her chin as she reflected on Tom's idea. "It's not a bad idea. But do we have enough time? The other teams are sure to be here soon and-"

"The clothes Jen! Think of the clothes!"

Jen struggled with the idea a couple more seconds before deciding that their clothes were indeed important enough to not get stained with sand.

* * *

 ** _MAP ROOM CONFESSIONAL – (Tom and Jen – The Fashion Bloggers)_**

 **Jen –** We know we're taking a big risk going back into town and that we're practically giving up our first place lead. But there is NO way we're letting these clothes get ruined!

 **Tom –** Oh, totes! If the original designer saw us wearing these clothes while digging in sand, they would literally send the Fashion Mafia after us.

 **Jen –** (Shuddering) You do NOT want to get on the bad side of the Fashion Mafia.

 ** _(END)_**

* * *

"TO THE SWIMSUIT SHOP!" Tom and Jen cried out. The duo then raced off as quickly as they could., leaving The Roommates behind.

"My. You certainly have to admire their dedication to their jobs," Aaron noted.

"Forget that! We're in first place! Let's take it and roll with it! Are we scanning or are we spiking?"

Aaron took the clue and studied it. "Hmm... the beach itself is 8.2 kilometers so that would be a LOT of area to scan. But then again, neither one of us is really that good at volleyball, so-"

As Aaron was talking, Greg turned his attention toward the 90 volleyball courts that were located on the beach. Only one of those courts had been reserved for the competition. And on that very court, Greg's eyes came upon two gorgeous blonde-haired girls with athletic-toned bodies and in professional beach volleyball attire, which was just a white sports bra and short shorts.

'Oh... thank you God,' Greg whispered to himself as his smile grew and grew.

"-on the other hand, if we were to-"

"Come on! We're spiking! Let's move before another team shows up!"

Before Aaron had time to comprehend what was happening, Greg had grabbed hold of Aaron and was practically dragging his partner over to the volleyball courts. When they arrived, Aaron caught sight of the two beautiful volleyball pro's.

"Ugh. Why am I not surprised you've let your pants do the thinking for you once again?" Aaron sighed as he looked at his partner, who was grinning cheek to cheek as he gazed upon the two blondes.

The referee ushered The Roommates onto the volleyball court and then took his place in the ref's chair.

"GAME BEGIN!" called the referee.

"All right! Here we go!" Greg cried out excitedly as he got ready to serve the ball. "Just to let you girls know, I'd be perfectly fine with either one of you spiking me, if you know what I mean!"

The taller, blonde-haired roommate failed realize the look of utter disgust on the faces of both female volleyball players as he said these words.

"Heck!" he continued, oblivious to their disdain. "I'm the kind of guy where if you're lucky enough, you both would get to spike me at the same time! I'd be down for that kind of thing! It'd be a night we'd never forget! Two for the price of one!"

Greg then served the ball. One of the girls set the ball for her partner, who them spiked it directly toward Greg. Her aim was right on point at the volleyball smacked him directly in the face. Seconds later, Greg fell to the ground.

"No points! Pro's ball!" The referee called.

Greg pulled himself back to his feet and brushed off the pain his face was feeling.

"Oh, so you like to do it rough, huh?" he chuckled excitedly. "Like I said, I'm totally all right with experimenting! Never tried it before to be honest, but it sounds fun! Two dominatrices! That's gotta be some dream come true! Tell me to bark and I-"

 ** _POW!_**

Greg never to to finish his sentence. One of the girls had served the ball as he was talking with such force and aim that again Greg was smacked in the face and knocked off his feet.

Aaron looked down where his partner lay and groaned in frustration.

* * *

Meanwhile, a wave of cabs began to arrive at Woodbine Beach. The order of this wave was as follows:

2.) The Surfers/The Soccer Stars  
3.) The Reality Pros/The Reality Rivals  
4.) Business Tycoons/Father & Son  
5.) Geniuses/Cosplayers  
6.) The Best Friends/The "Big Brother" Participants

"And people laughed at us lat year when we told them that we spent all of our free time studying streets throughout the world," Ellody chuckled.

"I bet all the teams that are stuck in traffic aren't laughing at us now," Mary added, snorting a little as she laughed.

Nearby, Sabrina chuckled as she heard Mary's snort laugh.

"See babe?" Sabrina nudged her teammate. "I told you that teaming up with them would be a good idea? We're among the first teams to arrive."

Calleigh rolled her eyes and chuckled as her teammates enthusiasm. "Okay, you were right for once in your life, I admit. ….but stop calling me babe."

"Oh. Right. Sorry," Sabrina nervously chuckled as she rubbed the back of her forehead.

* * *

 ** _WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL (The Cosplayers – Sabrina and Calleigh)_**

 **Sabrina –** Hey all you lovely people watching out there! I'm Sabrina! And this is my bestie Calleigh. And we're both cosplayers.

 **Calleigh –** (Her arms are folded and she isn't as energetic as her partner) But unfortunately, cosplaying isn't helping us pay the rent back home. So we've got other jobs too. For example, I have to work at a convenient store at night and I work as a salesman for a paper company during the day **[4]**

 **Sabrina –**

(Chuckling nervously) And I got a little luckier than she did. I have a modeling job for a beach dress company. But our dream is to be full time professional cosplayers.

 **Calleigh –** Or at least make a decent living off of it. Since I don't think it's quite possible to do unless we sell pictures of ourselves in skimpy clothing or our bathwater to a bunch of online perverts. **[5]**

 **Sabrina –** Oh, good night, no way. My babe and I would never stoop to that. We've got a LITTLE more respect for the art of cosplaying than that.

 **Calleigh –** (Rolling her eyes and huffing) Sabrina, for the hundredth time. Stop calling me babe.

 **Sabrina –** Oops... eh heh... sorry. Old habits are hard to break.

 ** _END_**

* * *

At the Don Box, the Best Friends and the Big Brother Participants were studying the clues.

"What do you think hon?" Devin asked his girlfriend. "Do you feel comfortable playing volleyball?"

Carrie studied the clue and glanced over at the volleyball nets. One of the blonde haired professional players spiked the volleyball right smack in the middle of Greg's forehead, knocking the larger roommate to the ground yet again.

"Uh... I don't think we stand a chance against professional volleyball players," she shuddered.

"All right. Then we'll scan the beach for the clue."

"Sounds good to me hon. Let's get a metal detector and... and..."

Carrie's voice trailed off as she noticed the young teenage Ryan staring at Carrie. His eyes were full of admiration and a great smile had formed as he gazed upon one half of the veteran team.

"Um... hi there," Carrie nervously chuckled.

Then, as if her voice has snapped him out of his trance, Ryan quickly took a step back, cleared his throat, and straightened his tie.

"Uh... um... H-Hi there. I'm Ryan, law student. I'm a big fan of you Miss Carrie."

As he said that, he saw out of the corner of his eye Devin and gasped in fright.

"Uh, that is, I'm a big fan of yours too Mr. Devin," he quickly added. "Both of you in fact. I was rooting for you guys to win last season. I loved watching you guys! Both of you! Especially you Miss Carrie... No! Wait! I didn't mean it like that! I... I... ooooooh boy, did I just blow it..."

Completely mortified, the fourteen year old pulled out a paper bag from his backpack, put it over his head, and walked away.

Confused, Devin and Carrie glanced over at DJ.

"He's socially awkward," DJ explained before running after his younger partner toward the metal detectors.

* * *

 ** _WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – (Big Brother Participants – Ryan and DJ)_**

 **Ryan –** (He still has a paper bag over his head) My mom says I spend too much time reading by myself, so she signed me up for the Big Brother Program to try and get me to interact with other people. I was excited when I heard that DJ from Total Drama Island was my partner for the program... but I didn't think I'd be brought into this competition and competing against some of my heroes from last season.

 **DJ –** (Putting his hand on Ryan's back) Aw, don't beat yourself up little buddy. It takes time to learn how to interact with other people. And what better way to motivate yourself to learn than to join a reality competition?

 **Ryan –** (He hangs his head low) Reading about how to overcome social anxieties; taking it slow by going to the park; partaking in a group activity that involves other people that share a hobby... shall I go on?

(DJ, somewhat shocked by his partner's answer, scratches the back of his head)

 **DJ –** I gotta occasionally remind myself that Ry-Ry's IQ is off the chart.

 ** _END_**

* * *

Six more cabs then pulled up to Woodbine beach. The order was as follows:

7.) Tough Grannies/Tennis Pros  
8.) Cadets/Super Heroes  
9.) Farmers/Daters  
10.) Rockers/Medical Student  
11.) Military Cadets/Goths  
12.) Mother and Daughter/SJWs

"Bah! Any slower and the turtles would have started to pass us!" Cindy barked as she shoved the Tennis Pros aside upon exiting her cab.

"I could have run that faster if I was allowed!" Anna growled as she cricked her neck. She then glanced down at the ground where the Tennis Pros lay face down. "What the heck are you two doing down there?!" She demanded. "Ya know you're in a race, dont'cha?!"

"Ugh, give us a break lady!" Gerry groaned as he stood up and brushed the sand off his shirt. "We're sixty years old!"

"Ah, suck it up ya big babies!" Anna replied, standing tall and proud. "We're in our eighties and you don't hear us whining about our bones being tired! It's called exercise!"

"What do you know, old lady?" Pete demanded as he jumped up from the ground. "We exercise plenty! There's a reason we're known as tennis masters!"

"Is that so?" Cindy grinned as she stared directly into Pete's eyes.

Then, without warning, Cindy elbowed Pete directly in the stomach. With that single blow, Pete gasped for air and collapsed to the ground, clenching his stomach in agony.

"HA, HA!" Cindy howled as she pointed at the Tennis Pro on the ground. "See? You're soft boy! Nowhere near as tough or fit as you claim to be!"

"Are you crazy?!" Gerry demanded as he helped Pete back to his feet, who was still clenching his stomach.

"Well sonny, if yer gonna talk the talk, ye better be prepared to back it up!" Anna retorted.

"Like me for example!" Cindy proudly boasted. "I do at least one hundred sit up every single morning! My stomach is as hard as a rock!" Cindy them stepped forward and placed her hands on her hips, her stomach area completely unguarded. "Go on, kiddo! Hit me right there! Give it your best shot!"

Pete and Gerry just stared at the tough grannies that were standing above them. Despite their appearance as old ladies, their appearance was quite terrifying to the Tennis Pros. Looking for a way out, the two began to frantically look around the beach.

"Oh! Look over there! The Don Box! Let's hurry over Gerry!" Pete declared. Without waiting for an answer, he raced off toward the beach.

"Hey! Wait for me!" Gerry cried out as he raced for his partner

Anna and Cindy just watched as the sixty year old tennis rivals ran as fast as they could toward the beach.

"Cindy, darling, you think this is why we've been single all these years?" Anna asked.

"Well, what can we say Anna dearie? These young men just can't handle real women like us!"

The Tough Grannies then shared a laugh as they raced for the Don Box.

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – (Tennis Pros – Gerry and Pete) |**_

 **Gerry –** Remind me why we signed up to do this again?

 **Pete –** The sponsors, Gerry. We're too old to make money playing tennis so we need the sponsors.

 **Gerry –** So instead of trying to get sponsors through our agents and appearing at charity events, we go on a reality show that almost twenty times more physically grueling than an actual game of tennis?

 **Pete –** (Sighs in sorrow) Yeah, we clearly didn't think this one all the way through, did we?

 _ **END**_

* * *

As the teams from the second group of cabs raced for the Don Box, another cab pulled up. Jen emerged from the cab first and was now sporting a stylish sun hat with her hair down from her usual pony tail. She was also sporting a stylish blue floral cover-up dress which was transparent enough to make out a black bikini top with black shorts.

"This shade of blue really compliments the black," Jen spoke to the camera. "Truly a work from a genius beach attire designer."

"Oh, totally fabulous," Tom replied as he stepped out of the cab. He was now wearing shades that went with his light blue button up shirt, tanned shorts, and light blue beach shoes. "As for me, I went with the light blue colors. Blue is totally the color that works best for me."

"And best of all, these amazing clothes not only look fabulous... but they're machine washable! That's gonna be important for this competition!"

"Speaks of which, we should probably get back to the competition now, huh?"

"Right!" Jen looked over at the volley ball courts. Then to the beach where some teams were scanning for their next clue. "It doesn't look like all the teams are here yet! We've still got a good chance to finish first! Or at least in the top ten! Let's move!"

* * *

As Tom and Jen raced for the beach to pick up their metal detector to start scanning, the final group of cabs arrived at the beach. The order was:

13.) The Opposites/The Vegans  
14.) The Sisters/The Critics  
15.) The Adversity Twins/The Bouncers  
16.) The Ice Dancers/Team EVIL  
17.) The Survivalists/The Larpers  
18.) The Twin Sisters/The Step Brothers

"Curse that wretched Toronto traffic!" Max cried out as he exited the cab. "Trying to foil my attempts of world conquest! Well, no matter! For there is no stopping the efforts of **pure evil!"**

A sudden shriek of terror and disgust made Max jump a little. Within seconds of the screaming, Jacques and Josse bolted out of the cab in horror and ran for the beach as fast as they could.

The sight of the Ice Dancers fleeing from him made Max feel quite proud of himself.

"That's right! Flee you wretched wannabes!" he called after them. "Flee from the presence of **pure evil! BWA HA HA HA!** "

Unbeknown to Max while he was laughing, his partner Zachariah had stepped out of the cab and stood behind him. He was so focused on making sure his laugh was evil enough that he had not seen his partner with a rat tail hanging out of his mouth. He quietly slurped up the tail and swallowed before returning to his vegetated gaze.

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – (The Ice Dancers – Jacques and Josse)**_

 **Jacques –** (His face is pure terror) He ate a rat! He **ATE** a **RAT** that was living in the cab! **HE ATE IT!**

(Josse reaches over and slaps Jacques across the face, which calms him down for a moment)

 **Josse –** Calm down Jacques! Focus! (She takes a deep breath before continuing) The choice was an easy one. With our superior athletic abilities, we chose "spike". Once we win the game, we'll be in first place! (She then shudders) And hopefully as far, far away from that pale-skinned freak as we can get.

 **Jacques – HE ATE IT!**

 _ **END**_

* * *

At the Don Box, the final teams were getting their clues and were making their choices. Among them, the adversity twins had chosen to scan the beach. But before they could grab their metal detectors, they let out a shriek of shock as they felt themselves being pulled forcefully behind a set of bushes by the hoods of their shirts.

"We don't have any money!" Mickey frantically cried out as he defenselessly waved his hands around in a feeble attempt to wave off his alleged attacker.

"We don't have anything of value either! Just please don't hurt us!" Jay begged, waving his hands just like his brother.

"Sheesh... yous two really are pathetic, ain'tcha?"

Mickey and Jay each opened one eye. They calmed down immediately when they saw that it was only The Bouncers Marcus and Devon.

"Whew! It's just you two," Mickey sighed in relief.

"Just us two?! What do you mean by that?!" Marcus demanded, he and Devon now glaring at the Adversity Twins, which was enough to make the twins start trembling once again.

But within seconds, Marcus and Devon's glares disappeared and the two began laughing.

"We're just messing with yous two!" Marcus howled as he playfully slapped Mickey and Jay on the backs, unintentionally knocking them off their feet. Seeing this, Marcus reached down and pulled them up as quickly as they went down.

"Yous two really need to learn how to stands on your own two feet! We ain't always gonne be around to pick yous up, yous know."

"Oh, my brother. Testify," Devon agreed as he brushed the sand off of Mickey and Jay.

"W-What do you two want?" Jay asked, trying to regain his balance after being knocked off his feet.

"Listen up kiddos!" Marcus spoke. "Me and my brother here watched yous guys last season. And we gotta say; we're impressed and inspired by yous two."

"You... you are?" Jay asked, seemingly surprised and pleased.

"Yeah!" Marcus continued. "Normally, ya don't see too many scrawny, fragile, pencil-necked geeks like yous competing in a competition as physically demanding as this one."

"Oh, my brother. Testify," Devon said, nodding his head in agreement.

Upon hearing those words, Mickey and Jay groaned as they were unintentionally being belittled.

"But you's guys did it anyway. You showed more guts than most people I know. And in my humble opinion, that's more than enough to prove you're bigger men than you let on to be. Right brother?"

"Oh, my brother. Testify!" Devon agreed, smacking Jay and Mickey on the back in approval (and knocking them both down again to which Devon quickly helped them back on their feet once again).

"Anyways, we wanted to let yous know that we saw what happened to yous last season."

"What do you mean?" Mickey questioned.

"Getting screwed over by those sisters like that! All because that beta punk couldn't get his groove on during the air guitar challenge! If yous ask me, the two of yous would have gone a heck of a lot farther than that if those hussies had just minded their own business and let the competition play out fair and square."

Jay huffed in frustration at that memory. Needless to say he was still bitter over what had happened.

"That's why we're offering our services to yous. An alliance of sorts!"

"Alliance?" Mickey glanced over at Jay. It was his brother who had suggested that they not form an alliance with anyone last season. A decision that probably hurt them as another alliance had sabotaged their chances at winning.

"I'll be brutally honest with yous two. You're scrawny weaklings who couldn't hurt a butterfly. Heck, if I was a bettin' man, I'd bet on the butterfly to win the fight. Because of that, yous two became a target."

Mickey could see Jay clenching his fists in frustration as he continued to reflect on the things that had happened to the two of them last year. From Taylor and MacArthur pushing Mickey during the fire ant challenge in Brazil to the Goths scaring them countless times.

"But I'll tell yous right now! Teamed up with me and my brother from another mother here, the number of teams that will screw with yous? ZERO! None! Ziltch! Nada! Ain't a one of them that would dare screw with yous knowing we got your back! Right Devon?!"

Devon chuckled menacingly as he cracked his knuckles. "Oh... my brother... **testify.** "

Mickey rubbed the back of his head nervously. He wasn't sure if teaming up with a team as intimidating was such a good idea. But then again, Marcus made some very good points. To which Devon had testified to all of them. Looking over at Jay, he could see it in his brother's eyes too. The offer was very tempting to him.

"Tell yous what. Yous two think about it, all right. Then at the end of this jaunt, if you're still in it, we can talk more. Until then, Devon and I are gonna go spike some volley ball punks into the ground! Let's go Devon!"

" **Oh, my brother! TESTIFY!** " Devon cried out as he and Marcus raced for the volleyball courts.

Jay snatched one of the metal detectors and dragged it to the beach to begin the challenge. Mickey followed closely, reflecting on the conversation and offer from the bouncers. It made sense, but was it the right decision?

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL (Adversity Twins - Mickey and Jay)**_

 **Jay –** It's true what Marcus said. And while we did overcome a lot of adversity last season, that doesn't change the fact that Emma cost us the race that year! And deep down, I kinda want to get even with her for that.

 **Mickey –** I get what you mean... but is revenge really worth it? I mean, not only is it kinda wrong to hold a grudge... but if we hold grudges too long, it could affect our blood pressure and that would lead to a whole list of other medical problems.

 **Jay –** That's true. And the stress of it would give me more headaches than I'm usually accustomed too... but I still can't help but think about all the trials we didn't get to overcome because of what Emma did to you last year and... I just can't forgive her for that.

(Jay's eyes then begin to roll around his head. Thankfully Jay is able to shake it off)

 **Jay –** Sorry, rage started building inside me and even the tiniest hint of rage triggers nausea and dizziness.

 _ **END**_

* * *

 _ **(HOST DON)**_

"All the teams have successfully arrived at Woodbine Beach. And despite some teams being held up by traffic, they are back in the race.

Clearly, 'Scan' is the more popular of the two choices as a total of 24 teams have chosen to scan the beach to find their next clue. But they'll have to cover the entire 8.2 Kilometers of beach here at Woodbine.

"How's that physically possible?!" cried James of the critics from off screen.

"Yeah! Something like that just doesn't make sense in the least! It's totally unrealistic!" Doug added.

"Mmm. Indeed," Don retorted, not at all amused being interrupted by the whiny team of critics. "The teams that have chosen 'Scan' are:

\- The Fashion Bloggers  
\- The Reality Pros  
\- The Best Friends  
\- The Big Brother Participants  
\- The Geniuses  
\- The Tennis Rivals  
\- The Business Tycoons  
\- Father & Son  
\- The Farmers  
\- The Rockers  
\- The Medical Students  
\- Mother & Daughter  
\- The SJW's  
\- The Goths  
\- The Opposites  
\- The Vegans  
\- The Sisters  
\- The Critics  
\- The Survivalists  
\- The Larpers  
\- The Adversity Twins  
\- Team Evil  
\- The Twin Sisters  
\- The Step Brothers

That means the other twelve teams have chosen to try their skills against one of three volleyball teams in a game where the team that scores three point first wins!"

"And one of those teams are totally hot blonde babes!" Greg called over from the other side off screen. "Seriously Don! Where'd you get these two! The size of their knockers is enough to make me wanna-"

 **BAM!**

Don winced as he saw Greg get pelted in the face with a volleyball again from one of the two girls he was talking about.

"Good lord Greg! Learn when to stop talking!" Aaron begged his teammate.

"Seriously, how are these teams able to hear what I'm saying from such a far distance?" Don questioned the camera man.

"That's another problem!" Doug and James called over at the same time.

Don groaned in frustration as he rubbed his temples. "The teams that have chosen to 'Spike' are:

\- The Roommates  
\- The Soccer Stars  
\- The Surfers  
\- The Reality Rivals  
\- The Cosplayers  
\- The Tough Grannies  
\- The Police Officers  
\- The Superheroes  
\- The Daters  
\- The Military Cadets  
\- The Bouncers  
\- The Ice Dancers

"Upon completing their challenges, teams will receive their next clue and a ticket for a ferry that will charter them across Lake Ontario to their next destination (which we won't say where now). There are four ferries in total. Each one will carry nine teams. And each ferry will not depart until nine teams are aboard. So teams could have hours of time advantage other other teams... or only minutes depending how quickly teams finish their challenges.

"Speaking of which, let's take a look at the teams right now and see how they're doing with the challenges they've chosen."

 _ **(END)**_

* * *

 _ **(Volleyball Courts – Spike)**_

"Game! Volleyball Pro's win! Roommates to the back of the line!"

"You gotta be kidding me!" Aaron exclaimed as he threw his hands in the air in frustration. "That's the third time in a row we've lost!"

"Hey, look on the bright side, will ya?" Greg replied. "At least while we're losing, we get to watch two hotties jumping around in their swimsuits. So stop getting worked over losing and enjoy the beauty and vision that is the bouncing of their-"

 _ **POW!**_

One of the blonde volleyball girls threw the volleyball at Greg, which hit him in the back of the head and knocked him off his feet.

* * *

 _ **(FIELD CONFESSIONAL – Aaron of the Roommates)**_

 **Aaron –** I would like to take this opportunity to point out to all the viewers out there that the words and actions of my Neanderthal roommate do not speak on behalf of my mannerisms in society.

 _ **(END)**_

* * *

As badly as The Roommates had been doing, none of the other teams were doing much better.

Brick dived for the volleyball, but couldn't reach it before it hit the ground.

Anna managed to hit the ball back over the net, but with too much power and it went out of bounds.

MacArthur hit the ball into the net, which bounced off and hit Sanders in the stomach, causing her to keel over in pain.

Sabrina ran to keep the ball from touching the ground, but missed when she tried to return the serve.

"Game! Volleyball Pro's win! Cosplayers off the court and to the back of the line!" the referee announced.

Sabrina and Calleigh huffed made their way to the back of the line of other contestants waiting to get a turn at the challenge.

"This is a lot harder than it looks," Sabrina grumbled. "Maybe we should switch to "scan"."

"Nuh uh! That's a whole lot of beach to scan! With all the beach, we've still got a better chance of securing the first ferry before they do. Besides, we only lost 3-1, so we've still got a chance to beat one of these teams."

"Game! Volleyball Pro's win! Surfers to the back of the line!"

Geoff and Brody hung their heads in defeat and too their place behind the Cosplayers. Geoff then glanced up and noticed the two attractive girls in front of him and his face lit up.

"Hey there. I'm Geoff," he introduced himself as he tilted his cowboy hat. "Nice to meet you."

Though Calleigh didn't pay Geoff any mind, Sabrina was more than willing to engage the surfer in conversation.

"I know," she said as she gave him a warm smile. "I saw you on Total Drama World Tour when you helped Bridgette win."

"Yeah?! Ya did?" Geoff asked excitedly.

"Sure did hon," Sabrina replied. "And I've got to say; the way you stuck up for Bridgette after DJ couldn't help her... that was very, very sweet of you." **[6]**

"Well, I meant what I said when I did it," Geoff explained. "Though Bridge and I weren't a thing anymore at the time, I still wanted to help her."

"I know, hon. I'm sorry it didn't work out between the two of you."

"Yeah, me too," Geoff said, frowning as he reflected on his past with Bridgette. "But at least we're still good friends. Heck! She even asked me to be an uncle for her daughter since she and Cody don't have any siblings!"

"Do I hear you talking about my baby girl Ula," came the voice of Leshawna. She and Tyler and just been beaten by the volleyball professionals and were now at the back of the line.

"Ula? Is that her name?" Sabrina asked.

"Yup! Sure is!" Geoff answered. "She's a cute little thing too."

"Gets it from her mom for sure," Leshawna chuckled.

"I take it you're still good friends with Bridgette then," Sabrina said as she smiled at Leshawna.

"You know it!" Leshawna proudly boasted. "She asked me to be her baby girl's aunt."

"Wow! How many of you did she ask to be Ula's aunt and uncle?"

"Well, there's me, Leshawna, Gwen, Owen, and DJ." Geoff answered.

"Aww, lucky!" Sabrina cooed.

"Yeah... lucky," Tyler mumbled as he folded his arms.

"Aw, don't be such a sourpuss boy," Leshawna lectured her partner. "You're their neighbor and get to see them every day at least! The rest of us have to travel miles just to visit!"

"Wow! So you and Lindsay moved next door to Cody and Bridgette then?"

Tyler again huffed and folded his arms.

Sabrina, not understanding what was happening, gave Leshawna a confused look.

"Sore subject," was all Leshawna said.

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – (Reality Rivals – Leshawna and Tyler)**_

 **Leshawna –** Things have been going pretty well for Tyler and I after Total Drama World Tour. We have normal jobs, but we still get asked to compete on some reality shows in our spare time. I still hang out with Bridgette and Cody, Gwen, DJ, and even Harold.

 **Tyler –** Things are going pretty well for me too. Competing against Leshawna on these shows is fun and all, but I'm excited to see what we can to when we work together!

 **Off-Screen Camera Man –** So Tyler, why are you on here with Leshawna instead of Lindsay?

(Tyler's eyes go wide upon hearing Lindsay's name. Then he grumbles and folds his arms in frustration)  
 **Tyler – (** Looking irritated) I don't want to talk about it.

 **Leshawna –** (Whispering to the camera) He brought Lindsay over to meet his parents and she forgot his name in front of them. It was all down hill from there **[7]**

 **Tyler –**

I said I don't want to talk about it!

 _ **(END)**_

* * *

 _ **(Woodbine Beach – Scan)**_

On the beach, teams were searching frivolously to locate one of the many clues that were buried somewhere around the beach.

Young Ryan was having some trouble operating the metal detector, so DJ took hold of the device and operated it himself while he gave Ryan the shovel should they come across it.

Ellody of Geniuses held the headphones tightly with one hand while she guided the metal detector with her other. Mary followed her closely with the shovel in her hand. Ellody paused for a moment to do some quick math in her head before deciding whether to continue in the direction they were going or to turn around and try their luck in the other direction.

Noah held his headphones tightly to his ear, trying to hear if the machine had picked up traces of metal. Unfortunately, it was hard for him to hear on account Owen was slurping on his ice cream cone a little too loud.

Dwayne was trying to show Junior how to properly use a metal detector, though he failed at this miserably. Junior rolled his eyes and with a smile, took the metal detector from his dad, turned it on, and the father and son duo began to scan the beach.

Nearby, Amy and Sammy were arguing with one another about how to operate the metal detector.

"Shut it Samey!" Amy barked at her twin sister. "If we let you operate it, we'd be out here forever and come in last place!"

"Us standing here bickering is going to get us in last place!" Sammy retorted.

"Then stop giving me trouble and let me operate the metal detector! You can do the dirty work!"

"Fine! Whatever! Let's just get a move on already!"

"Get out of my way and I will!"

Nearby, The Survivalists and The Larpers watched as the sisters continued to bicker with one another.

"Glad they're not my sisters," Jason whispered to Jamie.

"They certainly seem to have some problems, don't they?" Jamie replied as she put her headphones on.

"You should have heard them back on Pahkitew Island," Leonard added as he tried to turn on his scanner. "Amy was terrible to Sammy the entire time. Even I don't think there's a spell powerful enough to get them to cease their endless quarrel. How about you Tammy?"

However, Tammy remained silent as he held the shovel in her hands.

Jamie was the first to notice that Tammy was still upset.

* * *

 _ **(FIELD CONFESSIONAL – Jamie of The Survivalists)**_

 **Jamie –** Okay, so I know that this is a race where it's every team for themselves and that there's a million dollar prize that's on the line. (She nervously taps her hands together). But still... does that mean we have to abandon others in a time of need? I mean, Tammy's really upset. And she should really talk to someone about it. Some things are more important than money... right?

 _ **END**_

* * *

"Jason honey? Would you mind taking the scanner for this part of the challenge? You and Leonard can scan ahead of us and Tammy and I will follow."

"Huzzah!" Leonard exclaimed. "It seems as though we've formed an alliance for this mighty quest we are about to embark upon! Let us celebrate this alliance with a fireworks display! PYRUM! ERUPTUM! NUMOW!"

Leonard then reached into his pocket and threw some confetti into the air and cheered as his 'firework' display.

Jamie and Jason stared at one another in confusion at first. But Jamie told Jason to just roll with it for the time being and gave him the metal detector. Not understanding what she was playing at, Jason agreed and began to scan the beach for their next clue (that is after he showed Leonard how to properly use the metal detector which involved a lot of explaining that no magic was involved).

"So Tammy... something it clearly bugging you. I can tell," Jamie began as the two girls followed their teammates. "And... I can't help but notice your eerie silence ever since you and Leonard had your little spat with the twin sisters. What happened exactly?"

"Are you always this observant?" Tammy questioned, not looking over at Jamie.

"Heh. Most people call it being nosy, but I think I like your description of observant a little more," Jamie chuckled in response. Then, trying to take a more serious tone, Jamie turned her attention fully to the female larper. "So again I must ask. Why are you so upset?"

At first, Tammy didn't want to speak. But as she reflected on what happened and how kind Jamie was being to her, she couldn't contain herself any longer. She took a deep breath.

"Well, back in Toronto, Amy snapped at us and called us geeks, losers, and 'critical errors'."

"And her words hurt you clearly," Jamie noted as she glanced back and stared some daggers at Amy, who was still arguing with her sister over which way they should start scanning.

"Yeah, I guess they did," Tammy replied, looking down at the ground. "You must think I'm being pretty petty right about now, huh? Being so upset over some stupid words."

Jamie looked back at Tammy. The brunette survivalist could see that Tammy was fighting hard to hold back some tears. She wasn't on the verge of bawling by any means. But she could sense that Tammy was fighting back tears of frustration.

"You know," Jamie began. "There's an old saying: 'Stick and stones may break my bones. But words will never hurt me'."

"I'm aware of that one," Tammy huffed.

"Well... that's a lie," Jamie admitted as she looked down at the beach. "Words do hurt. A lot. In fact, if you want my opinion on it, I think words hurt more than sticks and stones." Jamie paused and took a deep breath. "Broken bones heal over time... but words spoken out of malice and intent to belittle... those wounds stay with you for a long time. Or at least, they do me anyways."

This got Tammy's attention. She now looked up at Jamie. "You? You've had people say awful things to you?"

"Who hasn't?" Jamie replied.

"Right. Dumb question," Tammy retorted. "But still, what would anyone have to say to you that could hurt? I mean, you've got one heck of a handsome guy who loves you. And you're pretty attractive yourself if I may say."

Jamie chuckled as she rubbed the back of her head. "Well, you said it. Not me," she chuckled. Then, once again taking a more serious tone, she continued. "Anyways, what you said... is exactly why I've been the target of so many hurtful words."

Tammy glanced up at Jamie.

"You see, Jason and I work on my parent's ranch and Jason lives with my parents and I. His mom died when he was born and... um, let's just say has a complicated relationship with his dad. Anyways, we get to be together all the time. And every minute I'm with him is a moment I would like to have last forever."

Tammy could see the smile forming on Jamie's face as she reflected on those precious memories. "Gee, you're lucky," she said.

"Yeah... I guess I am," Jamie replied.

"Sorry, but what was the point you were trying to make?" Tammy asked.

"Oh! Right! Sorry. Anyways, back home there were some girls who were stuck working at a local farm supply and hardware store. And... well, long story short, these three girls there would gossip about me and Jason. Spread rumors about Jason's previous life and would always say things to me that seemed nice, but I could tell they were being passive aggressive and their words were full of maliciousness. Things like 'be careful, hon. Don't want to see you become a mother before you're ready' or 'Gee, with clothing hugging your body like that, no wonder Jason fell for you'. In other words, they were accusing me of being loose and that that was the only reason Jason would be with me."

Tammy gasped at this. "What a horrible thing to do!"

"Yes... Yes it was," Jamie replied, sighing sadly at the memories. "The truth is, just thinking about it still makes my blood boil. Those three hens had no idea what Jason and I endured together."

Tammy then noticed that Jamie's blue eyes became somewhat sad and filled with pain as she continued to think about it.

"But then," Jamie composed herself. "My mom sat down with me and told me something very important to help me deal with such people."

"Let me guess. 'They're just jealous of you'. Is that what you're going to say to me? Because from what I can gather, I highly doubt that Amy would be jealous of someone like me," Tammy grumbled.

Jamie, brushing this statement aside, turned her full attention to Tammy once more.

"She told me, 'Jamie, honey. Those women are miserable people. Their lives are filled with such unhappiness and misery that the only thing that gives them any contempt is to bring others down to their level. Isn't it wonderful that you don't have to find happiness for yourself in such a manner?'"

Tammy paused in her steps. Seeing this, Jamie paused too. Together the two girls glanced back again to the twin sister, who were still bickering and barking at one another.

"I don't know what happened between those two to make Amy so disgruntled and miserable with her life. And though I certainly can't say I'm fond of her, I have to admit. I pity her. How sad it must be to have to seek happiness in the misery of others."

Tammy looked over to Jamie once more. This time, she could see the pity and sorrow in her eyes as she looked at the twin sisters.

Then, with a smile, Jamie turned back to Tammy and placed a hand on her back. "Aren't you glad that you were able to find happiness in your fantasy games instead of being as mean and malicious toward others as possible?"

Tammy brought a finger to her chin and reflected on Jamie's words. True, others found her hobby of larping somewhat weird and unorthodox (she could sense that Jamie didn't quite understand it either). But nonetheless, it made her happy. And reflecting on the relationship Amy had with her sister Sammy, she decided that Jamie was right. It was better than the fate that Amy had chosen for herself.

Looking at at Jamie, Tammy smiled for the first time since her encounter with the twin sisters. Before she could say anything, Jamie smiled back at her and said, "I know."

"HUZZAH! I found something!" Leonard suddenly exclaimed, catching the attention of the two girls. They quickly raced up to their partners and saw Leonard digging in the sand.

"I got something over here too!" Jason cried out.

Jamie ran up with the shovel and began to dig where Jason told her. Tammy did the same.

Second later, Jamie pulled out an envelope with a clue and a ferry ticket inside.

"WHOO!" she squealed as she and Jason embraced one another.

"Leonard! I don't see anything!" Tammy spoke as she continued to dig in the sand. "We should have found it by now!"

Leonard searched through the pile of sand that Tammy had dug up to see if she had accidentally shoveled it aside. Upon searching, his eyes caught something shiny in the sand.

"The travel tip?!" he gasped in excitement. He reached for the object and pulled it out of the sand, but his excitement quickly faded.

"Aw, shucks! It's just a silly ring!"

"Ring?!"

Jason turned around and raced over toward Leonard and almost snatched the ring out of his hand.

"Jason?!" Leonard was taken aback by Jason's actions, but was even more confused when he saw the look of panic on his face as he examined the ring. Seconds later though, Jason sighed in relief.

"Oh, man. For a second I thought that-" he suddenly paused when he saw Jamie and the Larpers staring at his, confused by his actions.

"-that it might have been an ancient treasure lost long ago or something so I wanted to see it for myself," he quickly said as he fiddled with the object. "But nope. It's not. In fact..." he took a closer look at the ring. "It really doesn't appear to be nothing more than just a plain old ring."

Then, without asking, he gave the ring back to Leonard, who observed the item for himself.

"Heh, hey Tammy! Look!"

Holding the ring with his index finger and thumb and holding it high to the sky, Leonard struck a pose.

" _One ring to rule them all!"_ he said, trying his best to sound like Gandalf. (Though his high pitched voice prevented him from even coming close to this)

"Heh, cool," Tammy replied as she approached to get a closer look at the ring.

"While clearly an excellent discovery during our quest, sadly it doesn't help us come any closer to completing the current task at hand."

"Right! We need to get a move on if we're going to find that clue!" Tammy agreed. "Onward wizard!"

Leonard, not wanting such a find to go to waste, placed the ring on his ring finger and quickly gathered his metal detector and Tammy her shovel. The Larpers bid farewell to the Outdoor Survivalists and continued to scan the beach in search for their travel tip.

"Good luck!" Jamie called out to them.

Jason chuckled as he pulled Jamie close to him from behind. "You know it's your willingness to hold onto your morals no matter what that made me fall in love with you, right?"

"And don't you ever forget it," Jamie teased. "Now what does the travel tip say?"

Jason opened the package and read the tip out loud.

"Take the ferry and cross Lake Ontario. The ferries will dock at **Fort Ontario.** Search for the Don Box for your next travel tip."

All right then!" Jamie cheered. "Come on! We've got the first ticket! Let's get to the docks and board the first ferry!"

Jamie and Jason raced back to the docks of Woodbine beach, where a ferryman greeted them and escorted them onto the first boat.

"Congratulations," he spoke as he boarded the young couple. "You're the third team to get a seat on this boat."

"Third?!" Jamie and Jason exclaimed at the same time.

Sure enough, aboard the first ferry were The Goths and The Farmers, each with a ticket and travel tip in hand.

"We're farmers," Timmy chuckled as he noticed the look of shock on Jamie and Jason's face. "Dirt's kinda our thing."

"Rather," Dale replied, sipping a cup of tea.

Jamie and Jason glanced over at the Goths.

"Loki sniffed out the clue and dug it up,' Crimson and Ennui both said at the same time. Upon hearing his name, Loki emerged from Ennui's shirt and gave a cute, but menacing smile at the Outdoor Survivalists.

* * *

 _ **(Volleyball Courts – Spike)**_

"Game! Volleyball Professionals win! Roommates to the back of the line!"

"GAH! ANOTHER shut out!" Aaron cried out in anger as he stood over a beaten down Greg who had been pelted by the blonde volleyball players once again. "This is ridiculous! We're not getting anywhere!"

"What are you talking about?!" Greg retorted as he stumbled back to his feet. "We're getting better! We lasted longer that time!"

"WHO CARES?!" Aaron shouted angrily. "We still lose three to zero! For the eighth time in a row I might add!"

"Just give it time!" Greg retorted, having regained his composure and balance. "Any second now those two hotties are gonna fall for my natural bod! Then they'll admit I'm a real man! They'll be so into me that their hormones will take over and then the three of us will-"

 _ **POW!**_

Greg was cut off as one of the blonde volleyball players he was talking about pelted the back of his head with another volleyball shot, knocking Greg off his feet once again.

"Jerk," both blonde-haired girls snapped in unison.

"That's it! I'm done!" Aaron cried out and grabbed hold of the unconscious Greg's hand and began to drag him toward the beach. "We're switching to 'scan'!" And within seconds, The Roommates were out of sight.

Back on the volleyball court, The Superheroes were getting ready for another go against the blonde-haired volleyball pros. As Quinton prepared to serve the ball, he began to narrate

"And thus, the resilient, yet weary Quinton, _**Master of all Stars**_ , steps onto the volleyball court to face the adversity of the volleyball professionals once again! Five times already our fearless hero (and sidekick Elroy) have failed in their mission to obtain the travel pass! But The Every Day Heroes are undeterred! And they won't back down!"

"Hey! Superheroes! You gonna serve today or what?!" Josse demanded from the front of the waiting line.

"That's **EVERY DAY** heroes!" Quinton snapped. "Now kindly hold your tongues! I'm trying to set the mood for this epic battle that is about to take place!"

* * *

 _ **WORLD MAP CONFESSIONAL – (Superheroes – Quinton and Elroy)**_

 **Quinton –** Salutations viewers! I am Quinton, _**Master of All Stars!**_ Soon to be the greatest hero that this world has ever known!

 **Elroy –** (Waving to the camera while adjusting his green shorts) Hi everyone! I'm Elroy! And I'm Quinton's apprentice! A Super Hero In Training if you will!

 **Quinton –** (In a whiny voice) Elroy! How many times do I have to tell you! We're the **EVERY DAY** heroes! People won't take us seriosuly if we go around calling ourselves super heroes!

 **Elroy –** Then why are we dressed up in these costumes?

(Quinton stumbles to find an answer at first. After a minute, he puffs his chest and continues to speak)

 **Quinton –** Because it is a symbol of hope for the public! A symbol that they, too, can become every day heroes!

 **Elroy –** I thought you said we wore the costumes because it would be more marketable to consumers to buy our merchandise.

 **Quinton – _SHHH!_**

 ** _END_**

* * *

"Game! Volleyball Pros win! Superheroes to the back of the line!"

" ** _EVERY DAY_** heroes!" Quinton corrected the referee.

"My card says 'Superheroes'. Either way, I don't care. Off the court!"

Quinton grumbled under his breath as he marched to the back of the line. Elroy went over and shook hands with both lady pros and thanked them for the game.

"Hero rule #452 – Thank the opposing team for a hard fought game. For without an opposing team, there can be no game." Elroy stated.

The ladies giggled and gave Elroy a small curtsy in appreciation.

"Such a gentlemen," one complimented as the smaller, chubbier of the heroes made his way to the back with his purple-caped partner.

Jacques and Josse came onto the court with pure determination and focus in their eyes as they glared at the opposing volleyball pros. Josse served the ball over the net. One of the girls set the ball for her partner, who jumped up to spike the ball. But this time, Jacques managed to jump up and block the ball from being returned to their side. The ball fell to the ground and the Ice Dancers earned their first point.

* * *

 ** _Field Confessional – (Ice Dancers – Josse and Jacques)_**

 **Josse –** As I mentioned last season. Being an ice dancer gives you a lot more physical and athletic abilities than most people would like to admit. Even these so called pros don't stand a chance against us!

 **Jacques –** (sniffs the air) Can you smell it Josse?! Can you smell victory coming our way?!

 **Josse –** (She sniffs the air) Yes! Yes I can! (She sniffs the air again, and this time her cheeks puff with disgust) I can also smell you haven't washed your lucky boxers in awhile once again.

 **Jacques –** (He nervously starts to tap his fingers) Last time I did, we only won third place!

 **Josse –** (She gasps in horror) You mean you haven't washed your boxers in over **A YEAR?!**

 ** _END_**

* * *

The game went on a little while longer. With the score tied 2-2, the volleyball pros had set each other up for another spike in an attempt to win the game. But as one of the girls spiked the ball, Jacques and Josse put their Ice Dancing abilities to use once again. All while smiling, Jacques lifted Josse onto his shoulders. As the ball flew onto their side, Jacques threw the smiling Josse into the air. Then, with as much grace and beauty as she could muster, Josse struck a pose before spiking the ball down onto the side of the volleyball pros, who were unable to keep the ball from touching the ground.

"Game! Ice Dancers win!" The referee announced. He then pulled a travel tip and ferry ticket from his back pocket and handed it an excited Josse, who snatched from his hands greedily.

"Hurry! To the ferry!" Josse cried, practically dragging Josse along with her.

In line, MacArthur and Sanders cursed under their breaths as they watched their formidable foes secure their spot on the first ferry.

"Nuh uh! No way!" MacArthur bellowed out! "No way we're coming behind those two arrogant fruit loops again!"

"No worries about that," Sanders assured her partner as she smiled mischievously. "Those two 'fruit loops', as you so eloquently described them, have given me an idea."

"Please tell me it involves a paint gun and a lot of paint balls," MacArthur begged her.

Sanders folded her arms and stared at her partner disapprovingly.

"I'm guessing by the way you're folding your arms and staring at me disapprovingly that your plan doesn't involve those things."

"Not even close," Sanders replied. "But watching how they played gave me an idea. See, we've been playing to the volleyball pro's strengths all this time. What we need to do... is play to **our** strengths!"

MacArthur raised an eyebrow at her fellow police cadet. "I don't follow you."

"I mean, we're not volleyball players! We're police officers, right?"

"Yeah? What's your-" MacArthur paused mid sentence and her eyes grew wide. Once she realized what her partner was getting at, she chuckled somewhat evilly.

"I see you get what I'm saying," Sanders chuckled.

"Oh yeah! Let's do it!" MacArthur cheered as she raced onto the court.

Once the game began, the volleyball pros served the ball to the Police Cadets.

"MacArthur! To your right!"

Ducking and rolling as though she were in the line of fire, MacArthur rolled into position and saved the ball from touching the ground.

"Sanders! Up high!"

The smaller police cadet put her hands together as though she were holding a gun. Then, with a loud grunt, she set the ball for her partner.

MacArthur then put her hands together and formed a finger gun as well. When the ball came down, she jumped up to meet it.

"Returning fire!" she cried out before spiking the ball over the net and out of reach of the pro volleyball team.

"YEAH!" both cadets cheered as they high-fived each other.

The game continued. And as the police officers played the game their way, other teams behind them began to catch on to what they were doing. The teams nodded to their partners, knowing they now had a plan to finally beat this team and get their next tip.

Sure enough, Sanders and MacArthur won the game and received a travel tip and ferry ticket.

After them, Micah and Brandon were up. But they didn't envision a game of volleyball. Rather, they envisioned it as a game of soccer. Micah with his goalie skills blocked the ball from hitting the ground. Brandon, as a striker, kicked the ball over the net instead of trying to serve it. Eventually, the Soccer Players secured the win and their next tip.

"Whoo!" Brandon cheered. "Our hard work and training paid off!"

"Yeah! Not to mention the power of positive thinking!" Micah chuckled as he accepted the tip from the referee.

"Um... sure. That too," his partner replied, not sounding like he was convinced.

Next up was Leshawna and Tyler. Though Tyler's athletic abilities weren't the greatest, Leshawna made up for it by playing the game via her dancing skills. Tyler was just good enough to support his partner and eventually the Reality Rivals got the win and their travel tip with ferry ticket.

* * *

 _ **(Beach – 'Scan')**_

"Got it!"

Carrie had dug up the travel tip and ferry ticket that Devin had found and the Best Friends raced for the ferries.

"Egad!" Leonard gasped as the Best Friends ran by them toward the docks. "That first ferry is filling up quickly! If we don't hurry, we'll have to wait for the second one!"

"Well we've got a lot of beach to cover still!" Tammy exclaimed. "It's like trying to find a needle in a haystack! We need a clue that will guide us in the right direction!"

The Larpers put their fingers to their chins and thought for a moment. Indeed, there was still a lot of ground to cover. But there was no way of knowing where the best place to scan was.

"Then we have no choice!" Leonard finally spoke. "Tammy! Pull out your shell flute and give me a magic boost!"

"Uh... isn't this what cost us the race last time?" Tammy asked.

"Fear not! For this time, we've come prepared! Our magic is much stronger than last year! I've been training and studying for this!"

Though Tammy wasn't sure about this, she obliged and pulled out her shell flute. As instructed, she began to play a soothing melody while her partner pulled out his staff and spoke a spell.

" _GUMIDE! USUM! NUMOW!"_ Leonard chanted.

As Leonard spoke these words, his eyes were closed as he was focusing as hard as he could on the spell. Therefore, neither he nor Tammy saw the golden ring that he had found earlier around his finger begin to glow.

Tammy continued her playing as Leonard continued waving his for about a minute.

Then, in the middle of chanting his spell, Leonard let out a gasp of horror as he felt his body suddenly being dragged along the beach. When he opened his eyes, he screamed when he saw that a giant dog had grabbed the bottom of his robe and was dragging him across the beach.

"Tammy! Tammy! Help!" he shrieked. His partner, who had heard his cries, raced frantically after him down the beach.

Other teams, as they were searching, were caught off guard when they caught glimpse of a giant dog dragging a helpless Leonard across the beach with Tammy in pursuit.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, Leonard's robe ripped at the bottom where the dog had grabbed him and the canine continued running down the beach with the bit of green fabric he had ripped off Leonard's costume.

"Gah! Vile creature!" Leonard called after the dog as Tammy finally caught up with him. As she checked him over to make sure he was okay, her eye caught something in the sand.

"Leonard! Look!" she exclaimed.

Leonard sat up and looked where his partner was pointing. Sure enough, there in the path that he had been dragged, a travel tip and ferry ticket had been dug up!

"HUZZAH!" Leonard cheered as he grabbed the package! "Let's hurry! We can still make the first ferry if we run!"

The Larpers ran for the docks as fast as they could. But as they were running, they could hear some footsteps right behind them. Tammy glanced behind her and saw that The Geniuses, The SJW's, and Father/Son were right behind them.

"Hurry! Faster!" Tammy cried out as she pointed ahead.

To the teams horror, the three teams behind them weren't the only team they had to worry about. The Bouncers had just beaten the Volleyball Pros and too were racing for the first ferry.

"Come on dad! We can still catch them!" Junior called after his dad.

"Power to the people!" Rachel cried out as she and Amie chased down the Larpers.

"Accelerate!" Mary called over to Ellody.

" **OH MY BROTHER! TESTIFY!"** Devon shouted.

All teams ran as fast as they could. But in the end, the ninth team to make it to the first ferry was...

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

...The Larpers!

Tammy and Leonard jumped on board the ferry and handed the captain their ticket. The captain punched the ticket, escorted them to the final seats aboard, and headed into the engine room to begin the journey across Lake Ontario.

"And one ferry has set off!" Don announced as the other teams ran up to the docks. "As for the rest of you, I'm afraid you'll have to wait until five other teams finish the next challenge before the second ferry can go."

"Aw, dang it!" Dwayne cursed.

"Apparently, our calculations weren't quite accurate," Ellody sighed.

"I for one think this challenge was fixed to keep us strong women from achieving greatness," Rachel accused Don. (The host just ignored her)

"...oh... my brother... testify..." Devon sadly whimpered.

Fortunately, the four teams didn't have to wait too much longer. Back at the volleyball courts, The Tough Grannies, The Daters, The Military Cadets, and The Superheroes had played to their strengths and had managed to secure a victory over the Volleyball Pros. Moments later, The Business Tycoons arrived with the clue they had dug up, completing the ferry of nine teams.

"According to my calculations, the first ferry is only ahead of us by thirty minutes!" Mary announced.

"If this ferry maintains a steady pace, there's still a chance for us to finish in first place!" Ellody added. "Let's go!"

* * *

 ** _(Beach – Scan)_**

"Way to go, roomie!" Greg muttered as he followed Aaron across the beach. "The first two ferries are gone and we haven't even picked up a trace of a clue!"

"You're just mad that you don't get to ogle over the girls with enhanced breasts," Aaron retorted as he held the headphones of the scanner close to his ear.

"No! I'm mad because we're practically in last place!" Greg snapped. "I mean, all these other teams have been searching the beach for at least an hour and haven't found anything! We've been here for half as long as they have! The odds of us finding a clue before the do is-"

"Found it," Aaron interrupted.

Aaron dug in the sand and pulled out the clue. Then, he held it in front of Greg's face and gave him a victorious smile.

But instead of congratulating his partner, Greg just folded his arms, turned away from Aaron and muttered, "Yeah, lucky guess."

"Whatever! Let's just go!"

The Roommates boarded the third ferry, where The Surfers and The Cosplayers were waiting to embark.

"WHOO! ROCK AND ROLL!"

Rock and Spud joined the three teams shortly after.

Following them were The Fashion Bloggers (Still wearing their stylish swimsuits), The Big Brother Participants, The Medical Students, The Tennis Rivals, and Team EVIL (Of which Zachariah had just finished eating the last worm that was crawling around on their travel tip.

The third ferry was full and left the port. The captain, nor any of the teams on board, heard the screams coming from The Sisters or The Reality Pros as they ran to the docks.

"No! This can't be happening!" Emma cursed. "We just missed it! That means we're stuck on the last ferry! Aka racing to not come in last!"

Noah glared over at Owen. His partner had cost their team a lot of time because he kept stopping to grab an ice cream cone.

"Uh..." Owen nervously chuckled. "Am I a bad partner?"

"Yes. Yes you are," Noah scorned as he slapped Owen with a rolled newspaper.

Emma stomped her foot in frustration. "How can this get any worse?!"

"You!"

Emma's eyes went wide as she heard a familiar high pitched voice. Slowly turning around, much to her dismay, there stood The Adversity Twins, Jay glaring daggers at her.

"...Well, ask a stupid question," Emma muttered to herself.

After what seemed to be an eternity (in reality, it was more like twenty minutes), the final teams that remained on the beach, being The Opposites, The Vegans, The Step Brothers, The Critics, Mother/Daughter, and finally, after much bickering, The Twin Sisters, had found their travel tips and had boarded the fourth and final ferry.

 _ **(HOST DON)**_

"And all the teams have completed their first tasks! The four ferries are now crossing Lake Ontario and are on their way to Fort Ontario for the next part of this challenge.

The teams aboard the first ferry are:  
\- The Farmers  
\- The Goths  
\- The Outdoor Survivalists  
\- The Ice Dancers  
\- The Police Cadets  
\- The Reality Rivals  
\- The Best Friends  
\- The Soccer Stars  
\- The Larpers

The teams aboard the second ferry are:  
\- The Bouncers  
\- The SJWs  
\- The Superheroes  
\- The Daters  
\- Father/Son  
\- The Business Tycoons  
\- The Geniuses  
\- The Military Cadets  
\- The Tough Grannies

The teams aboard the third ferry are:  
\- The Cosplayers  
\- The Roommates  
\- The Rockers  
\- The Fashion Bloggers  
\- Big Brother Participants  
\- The Surfers  
\- The Medical Students  
\- The Tennis Rivals  
\- Team EVIL

The teams aboard the fourth ferry are:  
\- The Sisters  
\- The Adversity Twins  
\- The Reality Pros  
\- The Opposites  
\- The Vegans  
\- The Step Brothers  
\- Mother/Daughter  
\- The Critics  
\- The Twin Sisters

Next time, our teams take on **Fort Ontario!** And by the end of it, one team will be going home!

Stay tuned! The Ridonculous Race is...

... _ **to be continued."**_

 ** _(BEFORE WE GO...)_**

The teams aboard the first ferry were resting comfortably as their ferry made it's journey across Lake Ontario. But little did they know, they weren't all that was aboard the boat. Without the knowledge of the captain, the host Don, or the teams, there was something else that had sneaked it's way aboard the vessel... and this something else... was very hungry...

 **A/N – Booyah! After almost a year, I'm back with this one baby! Things are slowing down for me a bit and I want to continue this story. Hope the wait was worth it. I know not every character got a lot of screen time or development in this chapter (Again, writing for 72 characters is a LOT of work.) But just because they didn't get it here, doesn't mean they won't get any period. Next chapter, I'll be writing for some that didn't get a lot of screen time.**

 **So who do you think is going to be eliminated first?**

 **Also, what is this creature that made it's way aboard the first ferry?**

 **Tune in to find out.**

 **[1]** Devon will say only this statement throughout the story. It's sort of my version of "I Am Groot".

 **[2]** I make no apologies for this joke. Craigslist SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS.

 **[3]** All of this information on Woodbine Beach is taken from an article written on the blog "Sports and Play" by Tanya Mok and is accurate as of the date of writing this.

 **[4]** A reference to "The Office", which I started watching finally for the first time. Calleigh works in the same office that Michael Scott manages, but she refused to allow herself to be filmed for the documentary on account she didn't want to be just associated with being a part of that.

 **[5]** A reference to a real thing that happened. No joke.

 **[6]** A reference to something that happened in my other story "A Codette World Tour". If you're new and haven't read that story yet, please go check it out. After all, this version of Ridonculous Race takes place in the same universe as that story.

 **[7]** It was confirmed from the creators of Total Drama themselves that this is in fact what happened to Tyler and Lindsay, so this is canon and not fanon.


End file.
